I worked tonyt to produce mini-CDs, which I theoretically offer to those interested parties, but which I have ignored in times recent. I will do givings in times soon of oldthings & newthing - a 23-part Erisian Ode of Soorts. It has sat in uncompleted ways on hard drive in iBook, but will emerge in a state in a time.
One Greenpeacefriendman by name Drew did invite Andrew Aaron Heathwaite (frabjous self) to do playings of Nimlibits at th former's (et al) party-for-we-have-an-apartment-now. Inside happy garage, under beams of florescence, charmed by proximity to green of pingpong, with friends I knew & didn't standing in viddy, I played one set as bard Nodal Nim.
I will make no attempt to recreate th song title content of th set.
I will speak of th fun. I had lots of. I hadn't played a longish set in longish a time, only doing occasional open mic things for lukewarm audiences. But Drewfriends all seemed to greatly enjoy, & that made many layered smiles manifest inside & out.
Th time arrives for me to seek shows about. I must start making contactings & schedulings & th like. I wish to do playings at all possible times & invite.
Thanks to Drewfriends & Myfriends & Allfriends who did stand in viddy to enjoyments.
Many abounding omniloves I send!
What fun! For my third visit to Dan O's open mic at Fixx Coffee Bar, many many a wonderful Greenpeace friend did do showings! I played tunes for great enjoyment of self & all with extreme fnord. Zowie!
Mine songs performed:
.. how to ferment th colon
.. 2G's [requested by Amy R]
.. vejtbls u'v nevr herd of [requested by Chase]
So finally I feel appreciated in doing doings. I hope to continue in songery & seek shows in near dates. On Saturday, I may do friendparty mandolinings; such remains likely but questionmarked.
So I moved officially into Tiffany's apartment last week (while she & Jordan, her 10-year-old, were both away in Vermont), & now that they're back, we're doing some things to get organized. Kitchen things are put away, th SEGA Genesis & Nintendo (old school!) are both set up, & my tie rack sits proudly on th bedroom wall. Much work remains yet to be done, but I look forward to doing it.
FNORD!
I made a fantastic vegan sandwich just a moment ago! It consists of:
.. green beans
.. tarragon
.. cashews
.. peanut butter
.. vegan buttery spread (Soy Garden)
.. black pepper
.. sunflower seed bread
I stir fried th veggies, then fried th bread like a grilled cheese, with butter on th outside & peanut butter on th inside (to help th ingredients stick). Th Soy Garden works just like butter for frying & spreading!
=Hooray!
~ a vegan, domestic, overbearded aah
p.s. Don't drink absinthe. You will regret it. Especially if you're "trying to sober up." Don't do it. Not even two little swigs. Not even if you see your friends waving their fingers in front of your face & hear them saying, "absinthe... absinthe... absinthe..." as if trying to inspire a psychedelic experience for you. Even if th absinthe appears blue. That's no excuse. You will regret it.
Nodal Nim did play tunes at Fixx Coffee Bar this prior evening. A Greenpeacer named Dan-O did host, played guitar, invited goodtimes. In addition to my frabjous self, I saw some guitarists, a djembist, &, wonderfullest of all, a sitar player. All did doings immeasurably. I did:
.. 25% mor monstr
.. cal it Home
.. 5 songs of fish
This place did I enjoy: persons & friends listened intently as I played; plum oolong tea appealed to my buds.
FNORD
On th trainride home, wondermagickal togetherhappenings did manifest. It began as I sat on my mandolincase whilst waiting for th train & reading from Finnegans Wake, James Joyce's masterwork in dreamlanguage non-linear holistic complexity. I enjoy partaking of said tome by opening to random pages & reading a few sentences, a paragraph or two, maybe, then opening to a new random page et cetera. I have not yet begun a cover-to-cover reading, altho I intend to when time ripens.
So as I sat with book, th wind blew pages, turning them randomly for me. Rather than grip th pages to prevent their turning, I enjoyed having th wind make my anti-decisions. So there I sat at th terminal, reading a book whose pages flapped in th wind, grinning & not seeming to mind.
A fellow (I estimate 32 years of age, thin, redheaded, only somewhat inebriated), when I glanced his way, handed me a Thing. I identified said Thing as a worn playing card, a two of hearts, actually, with an image of Elvis Presley on th front & back. Th fellow's explanation: "Bookmark." I thanked fellow with a grin, stuck th "bookmark" between some pages near th back of th book (sticking up so I could see it in peripheral vision), & continued doing exactly what I had been doing, amused that a confounded fellow found it appropriate to intercede in my peculiar reading practice.
I do wonder what he thought, seeing me do this. (John Cage might understand.)
So we rode th train together, & in th car, since no wind found its way to my book, I flipped th pages myself again, continuing to let th bookmark sit in its place. Th fellow sat not far away. We both got off at th Irving Park stop (Brown Line "L"), & at th bottom of th stairs:
HE: [Evidently amused.] Your bag is unzipped.
I: [Continuing to walk, not surprised or disturbed by th news.] Thanks!
HE: Wait, let me get it.
[I stop & th fellow begins to zip up a pocket on my bookbag.]
HE: I'm putting these matches in your bag. They're from my restaurant - you should come in sometime. [Drops in matches & finishes th zip.] I used to do this in grade school on purpose to make friends.
I: [With a chuckle.] Thanks again!
He passed me & turned right out of th station - I turned left. Only as he passed did I smell a touch of alcohol on him. (Yes, most people returning from a night out at 11:00 would have had a few beers - just plum oolong for me.) He found my private antics amusing, it would seem, & he found himself intrigued enough to invite me to his restaurant. I wonder what overall impression he got of me, how he explained me to himself. I felt elated by th whole strange thing (altho I didn't understand why), & I laughed & grinned all th way home & on & off until sleep overtook me.
Hello.
I really can't take th Hare Krishnas seriously, I decided. I won't accept any religion that takes its books literally. I heart healthy skepticism.
In th meantime, I've just finished moving into Tiffany & Jordan's apartment. I'd lived with George all year, but had spent much of my time there, so now I've made th move. I feel good about it.
I decided to embrace veganism, th boycotting of all products that come from animals. Since sixth grade, I've practiced vegetarianism, th boycotting of all meat products. I have done this not because I think humans shouldn't eat animals (historically, humans have always demonstrated omnivorous behavior, hunting & gathering, farming plants & domesticating animals), but because th meat industry raises animals in miserable conditions wherein they suffer as lifeless objects for our abuse. Meat in modern times implies animal abuse, which I decidedly do not condone.
Veganism goes one step further, refusing not only meat, but milk, eggs, cheese, honey, butter, etc. Obviously, it requires more discipline, since dairy products appear in many more foodthings than meat products. I used to say, "Cows don't die to make milk," which skirts th issue that, altho they don't die, they live unnatural lives wallowing in their own filth, hooked up to machines in factory farms, getting pumped full of hormones. Dairy in modern time also implies animals abuse - I knew this for years but chose to ignore it. I didn't want to commit to such a disciplined eating constraint.
But since starting at Greenpeace, I've met a handful of vegans who have shown me that veganism can work. It doesn't take much to become cognizant of animal products & avoid them in all forms. I feel great about my decision to stop lying to myself & stand up against an effed up form of animal torture.
So I recently checked out a nearby temple of th International Society for Krishna Consciousness, a.k.a. th Hare Krishnas. I had met a kind fellow on th street who offered me a book, Sri Isopanisad, which I took home & read with interest. Sunday I went to an open house promising:
* Musical Performance & Mantra Meditation
* Transcendental Philosophy
* FREE delicious vegetarian Feast
(I do enjoy feasts.)
I have found many things about th Hare Krishnas that I like a whole bunch. They advocate living a natural, simple life devoted to peace, love, & appreciation for th universe. They sing songs & chant, welcome people with open arms, & work to expand their consciousness. They consider all things Godly.
I have found a few things about them that irk me, also. Altho I can think of few more open-minded organized religions (they accept Jesus & th Buddha as holy men, even tho they don't connect directly with their movement, & they acknowledge that their path is one of many), they believe in Krishna as th Absolute Personality of Godhead, rather than one of many possible metaphors for an otherwise nearly unknowable God. They consider their path Supreme or Best & their holy books (particularly th Bhagavad Gita) Absolutely Perfect.
I don't accept Absolutes, but Relatives. I acknowledge Einstein & th Quantum Physicists & what they have taught us about th limitations inherent in every model.
For example, Hare Krishnas say that all forms of God emanate from th supreme, Krishna. Krishna has th attributes of a blue-skinned four-armed male anthropomorphic deity, who, while omnipotent & able to change forms, reduces absolutely to a blue-skinned four-armed male anthropomorphic deity. As soon as we accept this as th perfect image of God, we say that God cannot truly be black-skinned, twelve-armed, female & feline. But of course, ideas of God have emerged of so many different types that it makes no sense to me to limit our concept to one Absolute image.
Th idea of Krishna, like that of Isis, Yahweh, Tlaloc & Prometheus, can help us make sense of th universe & become more spiritual human beings. I find Krishna a beautiful metaphor, but not one that I choose to take literally.
That said, I intend to continue my exploration of th Krishna Consciousness Movement, thru reading, chanting, meditating, conversing with th very friendly monks, & trying to experience th Absolute Personality of Godhead as best I can while remaining agnostic.
sandy crushed ants in scepters
stinging raspberry red fingers
bags of random piles and globs
bankers of men fishers of Steve
rotating mama's llama's
point zero one elephantitis
paint me a picture quiet one
with your soft sand wax
drippling organic crashmaidens
until cohering to swizzlesticks
fraternizing with Chandra
you and your fan mail (will you/won't you)
sing me a return address
I'll scribble down simple hydrocarbons
Be it the one or the many
skies win on down the roads
roadus barrels roll
in moon clocking fish fashion
orgies on bended knee
stale bites between binded bands
bungalow dungfaeries swell eight
times polygon orcs
wild times will do thee good
peckish whims on button gardens
acidic gardener cracks paste
& counsels bumping ornate slates
virgin victims upon solid centers
wane from thy temptation
There happened feastings.
Last night, in recognition of my awaying (which awayed just this morn), we (my Self, Ameh, Bleh), created from chaotic brain embers & hats just such a meal as did ignite fine wonders. I speak of a four-bibbit amazing. We three did makings - we added Nick Borden for eatings.
Appetizer of crunchy yum: Toast with Sundried Toe-mah-toes, Green Olives, Red Food Dye.
Drinkly of chunky yum: Watermelonjuice with Mintleafings (from Gardenpicked), Amaretto, Fine Bibbits of Horny Fruit (Green Globules which do Encasings of Seedies) for Sittings on Top.
Main Course of complex yum: Okra & Zucchini, Onion & Limejuice, Garam Marsala & Unboxwine, Allspice, Waters.
Dessert of commodius yum: Grapefruit Quarters, Yumsauce (Cotton Candy Quite Melted, Jam&Waters).
A wedding I did attend - th hitching of Eric Fauss to Stephanie Thompson & vice versa! Fun abounded in bounds - from togethertastic lovely fronds of vows & speakings, to a ringing & a counterringing, to dances & cocktails & toasts, to smiling bibbits of most excellent happy. I felt honored & awed to participate (as Best I could). Hooray for all!
I did carpooling with th lovely Scott & Gillian. We encountered fun, adventure & secrets with our sexy GPS robot named Nuvi. Good friendlies at feastings included Jen A, Nathan S, Rachael F. I enjoyed seeing & meeting family & friends from all walks. Togethermagick abounded in ways. Hooray for all!
A goodness & sweetness & triumph & yay.
Holy hey diddle diddle (didl didl in cut spelng for those curious explorer types), I've been working at Greenpeace for an effing month! So weird, it seems to me, that I do what I do.
Often in life, I've felt like some space alien who crashlanded on th wrongest planet possible. I have never bought others' reality, never excelled at assimilation, never found myself easily grokked by th people around me. Chicago has seemed like just another miserable city on th planet of th squares slash ueber hip slash conformists slash nonconformistconformists. As always, I can find no culture, no subculture, of Andrews.
But since I stumbled into Greenpeace, I very recently realized that I have things that I can fairly & proudly call friends. We're th office of th misfits, & I effing love it.
I have stumbled upon friends in th past of course. It happens thru avenues of theatre, music, clay, & chaos - thru art - transcendent, chaotic, divine, explosively rich & challenging art. Thinking of this, I reach a realization that we Greenpeacers do art.
It goes like this:
Every day, I go to some given streetcorner in Chicago, approach hundreds of absolute strangers - each in their own reality tunnels trying to get thru th hectic day without losing their minds - & start conversations:
How are you today, sir? How do you feel about Global Warming? - Ma'am, you wanna help save a Polar Bear today, right? - This guy looks like an environmentalist! Have you heard about Greenpeace, man? - Come talk to me about saving our Mother Earth!
I find it utterly fascinating how absolutely th same everyone seems & how absolutely unique at th same time. I never have th same conversation twice. Never! (But th goal remains th same, more or less: convince th mark that Greenpeace is worth donating to & get em to fill out my form & give me eir credit card number.)
Since my last post, I missed birthdays - mine & at least two others, probably millions - & also Discordian holydays - Confuflux & th 23rd of July (I think all 23s ought to be holydays). I also failed to mention another Gallery Cabaret open mic that I played last week. I don't think it worth mentioning except to say that I wound up 23rd on th list thru no conscious action of mine.
FNORD
I've quite by accident discovered another holynumber of some importance: 331.
A few weeks ago, Greenpeace Chicago got 331 new member sign-ups, breaking th national records of all Greenpeace offices. It stands as our personal best.
A few days ago, another Greenpeacer & I signed each other up as members. Here's how I determined what I would donate: about a quarter a day is 12 dollars a month. Twelve dollars is slightly more than minimum, which is 10 dollars. I decided I like th number 13 better than th number 12. So I wrote 13. Then I decided to make it a palindrome, so I added .31, making th donation 13.31. See th 331? I didn't intend it, but it seemed fitting.
This didn't seem weird until this morning, when I bought a feta pasta salad. Th price? $3.31.
I'll keep you posted on further occurances of this number, & I invite you to do th same.
By th way, how does 331 fit with th Law of Fives? Quite simple:
3 + 3 - 1 = 5.
of my dinner of instant Indian food (veg korma) followed by home-made crepes & yummy tasty yummy cherry wine. Tiffany soon shall go away for a week, so we make enjoyments of sensations of yum & make yummy noises. In her absence, I intend to reads lots & lots of Ulysses & play mando & go. Also, Wednesday represents both payday & th firstname of one of th five peeps that I did sign on to Greenpeace today.
I like Dionysus.
A good experiment for th doing: try this reality:
Everything is connected. Everything is of th same divine essence; everything is a manifestation of God - God is a manifestation of everything. All disconnections are illusory.
When I see a person on th street, th person is me; I am th person. When an old woman scratches her head, I am an old woman scratching my head. When a nervous dude shuffles by & tries not to be noticed, I am a nervous dude shuffling by, trying not to be noticed. When my girlfriend packs for a week-long trip, I am Andrew's girlfriend packing for a week-long trip. & so on. For ever.
All th universe is contained in every component of th universe. Every subatomic particle contains every dimension possible. I am my dog. My dog is me. I am my God. My God is me.
Lather, rinse, & repeat.
Greenpeace continues to rock my socks. Altho on Monday & Tuesday we worked some weatheryucky days, today th temp stayed at a wonderful 71 degrees & awesome. I signed up six new members. On some of th sign-ups, I got really lucky, & on some I had to work for it. I'm turning into quite th manipulator!
As long as I stay above a certain minimum, my job remains secure. When I blow my minimum out of th water, I start to bonus & get more money. I hope to bonus my first week; I have bills.
Oh, & th sevenquestionmark in th title refers to a telephone sign-up (a.k.a. call-back) that I made this evening after my shift ended. It will count for tomorrow, so my record for one day remains six.
...literally. Well, th names part, not th kicking ass part.
Today I had my first real day of work as a Greenpeace frontliner, which means a person who approaches people on th street to sign them up as monthly members, & it totally rocked! As a newbie, I was expected to approach lots of people & practice my spiel, plus get at least one new member, at any donation level. I was crafty (& lucky) enough to get two new members. They donated 20 & 25 dollars, bringing me to a total for th day of $45, which is well above th requirements for full workers who've already finished training! Wow!
Beginner's luck, perhaps.
But I really enjoyed it. I feel like this type of experience will do wonders for my social anxieties. If I can talk comfortably to hundreds of strangers every day at my job, it'll find it that much easier to talk to strangers out of work, at bars & restaurants & wherever else people run into people.
Plus, Greenpeace rocks, & it feels awesome to work for it.
Imagine being given 10 minutes to prepare a 5-minute speech describing why you'd be a good candidate for a job. You're told ahead of time that your interview would be taped & that one of th interviewers would be an expert on body language & would be evaluating your gestures, posture, et cetera. Imagine you don't get to take your notes in & that you may be on some sort of mystery drug but you're not sure what.
Imagine that when you get in there, th two interviewers don't smile or introduce themselves, but just tell you to sit & start. Your image appears live on a TV screen directly in front of you. Imagine that you get completely flustered & sound like an absolutely incompetent moron while th interviewers just look at you blankly & take notes. When th 5-minute timer goes off, you are asked to do difficult mental math along th lines of "Count back from 6,422 by 13s." When you mess up, th interviewer on th left (a large black man who reminds you of a cop) says, "Are you just guessing? You know that's not right. Start over," & then gives you a larger number to start from. When th 5-minute timer goes off again, he says, "You may leave."
20 seconds after that humiliating debacle, you're sitting in a hospital bed getting blood drawn from your left arm, your blood pressure measured from your right arm, told to chew on a dry white tube so they can have a saliva sample, & told to fill out a form describing your emotional state: "On a scale from 0 to 4, how much are you feeling th following emotions: happy... frightened... angry... unsure about things... confused... bitter... self-confident... elated... confused... overjoyed... et cetera." This goes on repeatedly for th next half hour, with at least three people in th room poking & prodding you constantly.
This really happened to me. Yesterday. I swear to you.
It was a scientific experiment. I was th guinea pig. I did it at th University of Chicago for a hundred bucks. They gave me a mystery drug at around 9:00 AM & had me sit comfortably in a hospital bed reading & watching TV, filling out those "subjective response" forms every hour until around noon while I watched TV & read books I brought. I became very relaxed & started to think, "This is th easiest hundred bucks anybody has ever made."
I knew that I'd be asked to perform some task, but I didn't know what it would be. I didn't really concern myself with that. I figured it would be something cognitive, like sorting or alphabetizing. At noon, th person in charge set me up & ten minutes later I was in th interview room being terrorized!
FNORD!
At first, I felt really embarrassed, angry, lied to, taken advantage of, inadequate (for th imaginary job) & generally stressed out. I had just experienced a real waking nightmare! It was like all my worst days of submarining all rolled into ten minutes in hell! But I soon realized that th "task" wasn't really a test of my ability to talk or anything like that, but just a tricky scenario designed to catch me off guard & fuck me up royally, & it absolutely worked! I'm sure they found all sorts of stress-related endorphins in my blood & a heartbeat going crazy, & I can tell you that I put my first 4's on th "subjective response" sheets (4 = Extremely).
But when I realized how it all fit together, I laughed about it & noticed that I got a big rush out of it. It was like jumping out of an airplane & surviving; like a terrible horror movie; like almost dying in a fiery high-speed car wreck - but surviving. It was a rush!
Hooray for science! Sign me up for another one!
P.S. Th large black man, it turns out, was indeed a retired Chicago cop. Th mystery drug was progesterone, a human hormone. They're considering its use as a destresser, but at this dosage, it doesn't seem to help much.
Th Aztec Calendar has provided fun & inspiration again today. Th tonalpohualli (260-day count) declares today:
