MUSICK

This is a digital reproduction of a quite analog booklet I began distributing in Chicago on May 12, 2007 called MUSICK. Th original consists of sixteen tiny black & white pages with lots of words & few pictures. This version contains some scans of th original & some spruced-up stuff. I've added a few pictures, colors & comments. Th latter you will recognize because it will look like this paragraph: purple & italic.

00002

Salutations!

I am Andrew Heathwaite, a.k.a. Nodal Nim, & I welcome you to page two of my manifesto, MUSICK! I've got a few ludicrous thoughts to share with you today: some nonsense, twaddle, paradoxes & chaos that I hope you'll find inspiring. In fact, my ultimate goal with this free booklet is th formation of some sort of MUSICKAL COLLECTIVE (i.e. BAND).

Why th funny spelling, music with a k? It's based on th word MAGICK, thus spelt to distinguish it from stage magic - "magicians" pulling rabbits out of hats & playing tricks on people through deceit & sleight of hand. MAGICK is not th same as magic. Phil Hine, in his illuminating booklet Oven-Ready Chaos, tells us:

"Magick is surprisingly simple. What can it offer?

1. A means to disentangle yourself from the attitudes and restrictions you were brought up with and which define the limits of what you may become.
   
2. Ways to examine your life to look for, understand, and modify behaviour, emotional and thought patterns which hinder learning and growth.
   
3. Increase of confidence and personal charisma.
   
4. A widening of your perception of just what is possible, once you set your heart and mind on it.
   
5. To develop personal abilities, skills and perceptions - the more we see the world, the more we appreciate that it is alive.
   
6. To have fun. Magick should be enjoyed.
   
7. To bring about change - in accordance with will."

00003

MUSICK is an attempt to apply th principles of magick to music.

It is based on th ideas that:

1. You, I, everyone everywhere is a Robot.
   
2. We, as Robots, are programmed by our imprints, our experiences, & th things we decide we "know".
   
3. All that we do, we do through our programming.
   
4. Most of th time, we do not write our programming; it is written for us.
   
5. Metaprogramming is programming yourself - causing conscious changes in your own nervous system. It is th stuff of Shamanism, Magick, & MUSICK.

We, th collective, devote ourselves not to music, but to MUSICK! We challenge all musical programming for th continuous remanifestation of MUSICKAL metaprogramming intended to disorder & free everyone everywhere! We play to free ourselves, but also to free everyone everywhere. One unconscious listening experience (on th street, in a club, anywhere) begins a process of reimprinting / disordering of th mind & its programs through exposure to our highly charged musickal arcana. We play to illuminate!

Think all this is bullshit / metaphysical mumbo-jumbo / twaddle? Good! So do I!

Let's do it anyway!

00004

REALITY TUNNELS

Each individual's unique & very limited view of th WORLD is a reality tunnel. Peter Carroll, in his book Liber Null, suggests six fundamental reality tunnels that people have tended to adopt. He claims that one develops into th next, & that th whole set is cyclical.

1. Paganism
   
2. Monotheism
   
3. Atheism
   
4. Nihilism (Low Atheism)
   
5. Chaoism
   
6. Superstition (Low Chaoism)

"Try each of them for a week, a month, or a year. This exercise may save one an unnecessary incarnation or two."

00006

AGNOSTICISM

Some wisdom from Robert Anton Wilson

"My own opinion is that belief is the death of intelligence. As soon as one believes a doctrine of any sort, or assumes certitude, one stops thinking about that aspect of existence. The more certitude one assumes, the less there is left to think about, and a person sure of everything would never have any more need to think about anything and might be considered clinically dead under current medical standards, where the absence of brain activity is taken to mean that life has ended.

My attitude is identical to that of Dr. Gribbin and the majority of physicists today, and is known in physics as 'the Copenhagen Interpretation,' because it was formulated in Copenhagen by Dr. Niels Bohr and his co-workers c. 1926-28. The Copenhagen Interpretation is sometimes called 'model agnosticism' and holds that any grid we use to organize our experience of the world is a model of the world and should not be confused with the world itself. Alfred Korzybski, the semanticist, tried to popularize this outside physics with the slogan, 'The map is not the territory.' Alan Watts, a talented exegete of Oriental Philosophy, restated it more vividly as 'The menu is not the meal.'

Belief in the traditional sense, or certitude, or dogma, amounts to the grandiose delusion, 'My current model' - or grid, or map, or reality-tunnel - 'contains the whole universe and will never need to be revised.' In terms of the history of science and of knowledge in general, this appears absurd and arrogant to me, and I am perpetually astonished that so many people still manage to live with such a medieval attitude."

00008

DISCORDIANISM

is a paradoxical post-modern pseudo-religion devoted to ERIS, th Greek Goddess of Chaos, Discord, & Strife. It mixes humor with truth in remarkable ways.

From Discordianism's holy book, Principia Discordia, here are some illuminating Discordian catmas (opposite of dogmas):

"Convictions cause convicts."

"It is my firm belief that it is a mistake to hold firm beliefs."

" 'Tis an ill wind that blows no minds."

"Nonsense as Salvation: The human race will begin solving its problems of the day that it ceases taking itself so seriously."

"Every Man, Woman & Child is a Discordian Pope."

Here's another good one: "A Discordian is Prohibited of Believing what he reads."






00011

Some thoughts on GAMES. . . .

In everything we do, we are playing GAMES.
Everything is a GAME.

If everything is a GAME, everything is absurd.
If everything is a GAME, everything is arbitrary.
If everything is a GAME, ultimately, nothing is true & everything is permitted.

But most of th time, we don't play games of our own creation.
Someone else makes th rules.
We follow them.
Or if we rebel & break them, we do so according to an alternative set of rules which we also did not create.

Our musickal collective will not play by anyone else's rules. We will create our own & keep them constantly in flux, paradoxical, impossible to follow. In so doing, we will avoid dogmatism & taking ourselves too seriously.

We will disorder th rules through chaotic meta-rules.

Th goal of th game is to transcend th game.

Page 00013 in th original booklet consists of one POPE & one MESSIAH card with th message, "Cut these out to claim YOUR BIRtHRigHt." Rather than copy them here, I will link you to th place where I got them myself: poee.co.uk, an excellent Discordian resource.

Page 00014 is th back page of th POEE cards & contains just a bunch of black & th page number.


00015

Are you utterly confused by all this?

If so, we have more in common than you may think.

So there's th low-down. I'm looking for people. People who live in Chicago, preferably. People who want to play every style of music on every instrument they can find. (Also no styles of music on no instruments.) People who want to play on th streets & begin illuminating th world immediately. People who want to devote themselves to chaos & metaprogramming. This is not about making money or looking cool. It's about MUSICK. It's about being:

agnostic * chaotic * absurd * transcendent * viral

So contact me, Andrew Aaron Heathwaite, at
gtrpkt AT yahoo DOT com * 315-657-6839 * myspace.com/nodalnim

Satbot

Aloha, meine Freunden, mi prami rodo!

I haphazardly conduct experiments & miss work & such, but I will say hello on this Satbot to ya'll.

Satbot : a combination of Gregorian Saturday with Discordian Boomtime - a compromise & complication. 5 Discordian days times 7 Gregorian days equals 35 days (or would it be days squared?). Add th original 12 & you get 47 days. I find gladness in this; 47, as a number, doth generally rock.

		Sweetmorn	Boomtime	Pungenday	Prickle Prickle	Setting Orange
		-sm	-bot	-pud	-pr	-so
Monday	Mon-	Monsm	Monbot	Monpud	Monpr	Monso
Tuesday	Tu-	Tusm	Tubot	Tupud	Tupr	Tuso
Wednesday	Wed-	Wedsm	Wedbot	Wedpud	Wedpr	Wedso
Thursday	Thu-	Thusm	Thubot	Thupud	Thupr	Thuso
Friday	Fri-	Frism	Fribot	Fripud	Fripr	Friso
Saturday	Sat-	Satsm	Satbot	Satpud	Satpr	Satso
Sunday	Sun-	Sunsm	Sunbot	Sunpud	Sunpr	Sunso

Doesn't this make life oodles easier?

(Mayhaps if we take easier to mean more plainly absurd. A noble goal, this easier.)

Androse th Pagan

I have a delightfully not-insane submarining class today.

I started a new belief experiment (I stopped assigning Tarot Card Programs for each day). I base it on Peter Carroll's idea of Random Belief. He identifies six basic beliefs, which he says occur in humans cyclically. Six "to permit the use of the sacred cube," in other words, a six-sided die. He gives:

Dice Option Number 1: Paganism
Dice Option Number 2: Monotheism
Dice Option Number 3: Atheism
Dice Option Number 4: Nihilism (Late Atheism)
Dice Option Number 5: Chaoism
Dice Option Number 6: Superstition (Low Chaoism)

Yesterday, I rolled a 3, Atheism. I found it pretty easy, since I've spent many a happy day in this reality tunnel anyway. I used th mantra, "Let's stick to what's real, shall we?" I bought a book on Chaos Theory.

Today, I rolled a 1, Paganism, & so I've spent my time searching & finding Gods & Goddesses everywhere. Here's what I've got in my files so far:

Oogwee - God of Peanuts
yellow monkey head - metal teeth - speaks by telepathy

Meligoopf - Goddess of Lapsang Souchong
thick woman of vines - dark brown with orange flecks - loud raspy laugh

Lemibush - Deity of Unexpectedly Finding Things
hermaphrodite - crocidile shoulders - triangular - 19 eyes - gray skin

Soppit - Deith of Tables
hermaphrodite - 1/3 Sponge - 1/3 Sand - 1/3 Weasel

Chorlibar - Goddess of Green Tables
long & flat - scaley & hairy - squeaky voice - favorite number is nine

Hexbemmir - God of Forgotten Lunches
demon with three mouths - pink balloon belly - 777 teeth - large, fluffy, white beard, like marshmallow - dainty earrings

& th list continues.

sinus caverns

I suffer from a tricksy cold. As soon as I start to feel awesome, a new symptom will thrust itself upon me - a stuffy ear, a hacking cough, a headache. What fun this isn't.

I missed a few days of work last week, which for me means a smaller check. Th size of my check doesn't serve as my only impetus for living, but I find it frustrating that I don't maintain control of my health. I'd rather take days off from work to do fun projects, play great musicks on th streets, write that novel [hee hee], &tc. Instead, I lie around feeling sorry for myself & guilty for not working & messing with George's days off. =Poop!

Potter Stewart that! No more bumming for me! I will only do work & fun - no more Burgering around! Egad!

Consider that my Eris-o-Magickal Cantation. No more wasties! Begone, thou foul demon that infects mine sinus caverns! Away to Boomland for you! Egad!

I seal this Cantation with a hearty FNORD.

THE GOVERNMENT SUCKS

IT SURE DO

RAW on Artistic Revolutionaries

Yo! Robert Anton Wilson has some inspired comments about art & artists. I paste an essay from his website below:

30 Apollo 78 p.s.U.

"There are only two kinds of artists: the plagiarists and the revolutionaries."
-- Paul Gauguin


I love this quote because it sums up my own philosophy of art so neatly.

To say it in my own jargon, Gauguin's "plagiarists" consist of those who do relatively good or relatively bad work within "the style of the period"-- the dominant paradigm or current reality-tunnel-- and the "revolutionaries" create an entirely new style, i.e a new reality-tunnel (or, in the case of Picasso, a new reality-labyrinth.)

These "plagiarists" (remember: this pejorative term comes from Gauguin, not from me) may provide light entertainment but they have low information in the sense of Shannon's "Mathematical Theory of Communication." (where information = the negative of the probability that you can predict the "signal" in advance. If you can always predict it, it ain't information.)

In general, dogma always produces low information; see, the Fundamentalists (Xtian, Judaic, Moslem etc.), Marxists, Objectivists, Aryan Nation, CSICOP etc.) You always know what such True Believers will say even before they say it, and they all say it in the same words as their Fuhrer. In art, the "style of the period" = an equivalent of (perceptual/conceptual.) dogma, a rigid and familiar reality-tunnel This kind of art reaches a large public immediately, because the mass consists mostly of (in Houseman's phrase) "fellows whom it hurts to think." People in general love the familiar and predictable and have "crawly" sensations at the unfamiliar and unpredictable.

The "revolutionaries" contain high information and a whole new "style" of reality-tunnel (high unpredictability) and annoy or infuriate the general public. Later, with time, they get consigned to "starters of crazes" or elevated to Masters (those who really did enrich our experience of Universe.)

In my opinion, the primary "revolutionary" Masters of our past century include Picasso, Klee, Pound, Joyce, Faukner Ginsberg, Frank Lloyd Wright, D.W. Griffith, Chaplin, Welles, Clint Eastwood,, Stravinsky, Gershwin, Epstein, Brancusi, Carlin : the man or woman who doesn't know their work deeply and richly still lives in the 19th Century as the rest of us prepare to enter the 21st. The artists on that list haven't become familiar enough to stop surprising us. We still need to interpret our interpreters, as Ellman said of Joyce.

The "plagiarists" appear on popular magazine covers and the NY Times best-seller lists. God bless them, they live happily and sincerely in the same world as the mass audience.

More RAW essays here.

Discoflux & Hell

For some days have I lain in bed with sickness, not working. A wicked cold consumed me, & thus I rested. Today, I returned to th fold, although not to th school I've gone to exclusively for th past several months. Now that my class' teacher hath returneth, my school doesn't need me every day. So I hooked myself up to th good 'ol Wheel of Misfortune (i.e. th substitute teacher automated phone service), reported myself "available," & they sent me deep into th depths of hell.

Yes, if I were to assemble a Top Five Worst Submarine Teaching Days list, this would be on it.

Alright. I had gotten used to this sort of thing, but for a while I found myself in a more stable & comfortable position. Now, 'tis back to th fold. So be it. Someone has to shovel shit in hell, why not Androse?

Actually, I find myself in a surprisingly good mood today, considering. Perhaps because I can breathe through my nose again.

I almost forgot!
HAPPY DISCOFLUX!

mercury cafe om 4

For a highly indifferent unaudience, I did play mine songies last wed.

.. I am systms
.. levl 1
.. this ladybug
.. cal it Home
.. e blu apratus

Some dice-derived haikus

:01:

You raise your arms! For
Thou art. Rorschach didn't th'old
pond foundation; th.

:02:

Age spat upon shall
be more of, Pouf. Rise, O my
snake, into police.

:03:

And copious file
of th greyhaired Sheriff's. But
th first kiss of brought.

:04:

Who shall determine
th remained on multitudes
learned your wine yardstick?

:05:

Hark down, dipping my
wings, I office of th Rich.
I don't like are like.

:06:

You'll! I was alone
in not have not even art
Thou ever. Th Church.

:07:

Double, Sherwood said
silent vamp Alla. There shall
be no gloss finish.

:08:

There. Th entrance hall
is for gas. Yet I worshipped
her tin discovered.

:09:

Prospero burned his
of death and th central roof
where Mandetta bought.

:10:

Where shall be of three
thousand two at th. They fled
away at. A no.

:11:

At last after art.
A Wonder Bread core of th
mind time, by wood its.

:12:

Of Plutonium
by th rejected this as
th Diamond th up.

wee ghouls

I dreamed that a bunch of nasty wee ghouls appeared every time I snapped a photograph. To th naked eye, they appeared not, but photgraphic film brought them quite to our attention. They looked not at all friendly or decent.

I look forward to meeting them again.

days of holi

Hello, lovlies,

Hey, th date registers as April 23rd (in slave time), so that must mean some sort of holiday comes about, what say? Happy some-sort-of-holiday!

(& to me personally, Happy VI of Swords / Knight of Swords Day. What windy fun!)

Yesterday, Earth Day came about, & I hope th weather wondered you as much as it wondered us Chicagoans in 80-degree wondermagickal danceabouts. On behalf of Mars, Saturn, & Mercury (th celestial bodies, not th Olympiads & Titans), I register offense at th undersight that all th other Solar planets don't get their own holidays! Earth Schmurth!

I should mention, though, that th holiest of planets, th sextantric dwarf planet of Eris, of course, gets a quite joyunctious day of holi:

September 13 (37 Bureaucracy): Mass of Planet Eris

Smoke 'em if you got 'em.

~a

Gallery Cabaret OM 4 / X of Swords

Last night, George & I made th trek to Gallery Cabaret & I deposited a fourth performance of vast Nodally Nim tunery. 'Twas a nice time - every time I go to this place I enjoy it just a wee bit more than th last.

.. vejtbls u'v nevr herd of
.. ant lizard dragon man [lyricist: SMarshall] > wil we go out togethr?
.. Non-Violent Tae Kwon Do Troopers [lyricist: Caglar Juan Singletary; composer: David Fox; debut!]

I also played a frustratingly fruitless set on Milwaukee Ave in earlier day, but I don't have th set list to show you. I made exactly one quarter dollar, not counting th pity dollar George gave me.

FNORD

I've been continuing to study th Tarot; Tiffany gave me for our two-year anniversary a splendid little deck, & I've been systematically going through each card trying to apply th theme of two cards per day. 'Tis an experiment in th power of belief to change th world (my world, my perception of things, etc.). It's a lot like looking for synchronicities & omens & whatnot.

So it's interesting to note th way things correspond. I've noticed lots of relationships between my "fortune" & my actual day. For example, last night, some time after midnight, riding my bike home from Gallery Cabaret, I had a small but painful & embarassing accident with a couple of parked cars. (My groin will probably hurt for days!) I later checked to see what Tarot card I had assigned myself for that day (today), & indeed, it was th X of Swords often called Ruin. According to learntarot.com, th X of Swords represents:

BOTTOMING OUT
VICTIM MENTALITY
MARTYRDOM

This seems like an apt description of th feeling you get when smashing your genitals by absent-mindedly biking into parked cars, eh?

But th good news is that tonight I will experience th IV of Wands, characterized by:

CELEBRATION
FREEDOM
EXCITEMENT

{{{{{In my own defense, I must say that I have no intention of allowing myself to become "superstitious" in any way. I'm interested in studying belief & how it affects my perceived universe. These represent genuine experiments in meta-belief, & I'm willing to take them as far as they will go [hopefully] before I attain clinical madness.}}}}}

Nim at clarkbarryhalsted

I did a wee bit of busking at a new intersection yesterday. I played:

.. sience
.. lov song 6
.. wil we go out together? > ant lizard dragon man
.. prickle-prickle
.. slip on broken violence now [co-writer: NBorden]
.. th posm [lyricist: JCoolidge]
.. how to ferment th colon
.. e blu apratus
.. Maroon Dots
.. hail Discordia > vejtbls u'v nevr herd of

I stopped playing & started to pack up when two people (Stephanie & Carlos, I later found out) came by & said, "Hey, can you play another song? We left to get you a tip & now you've packed up!" They made my day! I gladly played 'how to ferment th colon,' when they decided they'd like a "nonsense song".

Carlos: Do you have any songs about chemistry?
Nim: No, but I have some songs about astronomy. I had th idea to write a song for each chemical element, but they I realized that would be something like 114 songs.
Stephanie: That's true. But if you stuck to organic chemistry, it wouldn't be quite so many. . . .

Etc.

What a delight!

Until then, though, I had found it dismal, & my total take added up to a mere (but typical) $3.50. Busking for money proves difficult.

FNORD

Jordan: [just a minute ago, while creating "butt-cards" as a parody of "Yu-gi-oh" cards] I know! The Three Buttkateers! . . . How do you spell "kateers"?
Nim: K-A-T-double-E-R-S.

mercury cafe om 3

Hello, friendlies. I hope you exist in chambers of numerous discordant delights on this day & others. Hi to you.

I played at Mercury Cafe on th eve of this day ('twas Discord 28, y'know). I had conversation & pleasantries whilst also drinking caucasian tea & reading about Egyption God(esse)s. Enjoyment ensued.

.. drone
.. Philosophy of the World [a cover of a song by th Shaggs - solo debut]
.. slip on broken violence now [co-written with N. Borden - solo debut]
.. glamorous & glassy-eyed
.. Deenmark

Grind OM 41

[[I think my numbering of Daily Grind shows has become effed up. Alright - I'll call this one number 41. I like th number 41.]]

FNORD

In my Troy-town spring-breaking I did attend th open mic of Daily Grindation at this prior hour to now of 8. Playings did I play: 3 daybyous. Th Good Mr Nick Borden joined in writing & performing th third 'un.

solo song daybyous
1 .. Rudolphus
2 .. glamorous & glassy-eyed

song with Nick Borden daybyou
3 .. slip on broken violence now [words&music by Nick & Nim]

I wrote (1) three days ago & (2) two days ago. Nick & I wrote (3) today (counting Thursday as today - technically yesterday). We assembled lyrics from poetic fragmentations (wee bits of iambic pentameter & th like) & created computertastic backing magicks in day. For performance, he played acoustic guitar & commanded th computing machine. I played mandolin & did singings.

'Twas nice to collaborate in quickness time. I enjoy th feeling of playing new things. I seek rebirthing from Chaotic Wombery.

~a

th Book of Bolton Reed

B: whats up?
N: Nothing. Drinking day-old coffee, listening to Lou Reed.
B: awesome
N: That sounds way cooler than it is. Or maybe it doesn't sound cool at all.
B: haha it sounds cooler than what i'm doing
N: Drinking Kool-Aid & listening to Michael Bolton?
B: haha I wish

Summa Discordia / Apocrypha Discordia

For my own satisfaction, I wish to review two marvelous post-Principia Discordian holybooks!

Principia Discordia

But to start with, I should mention Principia Discordia, or How I Found Goddess And What I Did To Her When I Found Her, th Magnum Opiate of Malacylpse th Younger - th first written utterances in modern times sent up to honor Goddess Eris, composed in th late 1950s & largely ignored in its time. This book contains th only canonical (if you can call it that) info about Discordianism. It introduces Eris worship through th authors' own psychedelic revelation at a bowling alley, pokes lots of fun at organized religion, provides suggestions for chaotic & ludicrous Discord, & even throws in some inspired philosophical bits. & all this appears amongs dozens of silly pictures, jokes & puns & Erisian Nonsense. It advocates Nonsense as Salvation, th Adoption of Holy Names, th use of a Discordian Calendar, th use of th Sacred Chao as a religious icon. It introduces some wacky fictional apostles, th Curse of Greyface, th Turkey Curse, tips for member initiation & th forming of independent cabals, & of course th Law of Fives (All things happen in Fives, or are divisible by or are multiples of Five, or are somehow directly or indirectly appropriate to 5). & all along it raises th paradoxical questions, "Is this Serious or just a Joke?"

Of course, th only appropriate answer to questions like that is Mu.

(After all, All affirmations are true in some sense, false in some sense, meaningless in some sense, true and false and in some sense, true and meaningless in some sense, false and meaningless in some sense, and true and false and meaningless in some sense.)

Th Principia changed my life & lots of others as well.

Lately, Discordianism has found a new life on th internet, where scores of strange folk have developed th basic ideas in th Principia through email lists & websites & found it quite applicable to th 90s & th new millenium. In addition to dozens of websites, a number of "holy books" have cropped up, all "kopylefted" - published with permission granted for anybody to do with it whatever th heck ey wants - "all rights reversed".

So I bought a few newer holybooks online & have been gradually reading them. Some I found too serious (th Books of Eris), too boring (A Pocket Full of Chaos), or too pointless (Apotheosis Psycherotica). I enjoyed these all somewhat, but I didn't find them exceptional.

Summa Discordia

However, just yesterday, I found myself totally enthralled by th Summa Discordia by th Beatus Ffungo. It really feels like it picks up where th Principia leaves off, but of course, forty years later. Th Beatus writes in a very smart, readable & humorous style, walking th same line th Principia walks between seriousness & comedy. I laughed out loud several times & found myself quite inspired by th book's empowering message of nonconformity. Where th Principia talks about Nonsense as Salvation, th Summa talks about th Functionality of th Strange. Ffungo derides THEM & th System & reveals to us that th Defamation League is trying to pass cabbages off as humans. "Why they are doing this is uncertain, but keep in mind these are some of the same people who said you'd go to hell for spanking the monkey."

Try going to a mall, for instance. Sit in the Food Court and just watch people. You'll start seeing the difference [between humans & cabbages] pretty quickly, and, if you're in a typical mall, about 85% of the ambulatory things you see will secretly be cabbages. If you can, sneak a quick third-eye glance just to confirm it, but don't let them catch you.

Th Summa is a great short read, but, like all other post-Principia holybooks I've encountered, its layout isn't as fun as th Principia's. Don't let that get you down. I think you'll enjoy it.

Some other highlights: Discordian Haiku, an interview with a Famous Guy (Jesus), th Mentos Conspiracy, a thoughtful discussion of Discordian Holy Names, & a very brief introduction to Operation Mindfuck.

Apocrypha Discordia

This 100-page compilation of Discordian writings provides a great variety of new ideas. I don't find it as consistently brilliant as th Principia & th Summa, but I uncovered some real gold in there. It features some ideas for Discordian ceremonies & rituals (A Mouse Banishing Ritual, an Invocation of Eris, a ritual for invoking th five Discordian Elements - sweet, boom, pungent, prickle & orange, etc.). Some of that seems to take itself too seriously, but that's a risk you take with things like that.

I particularly enjoyed th elaboration on Operation Minkfuck, which they also call Guerrilla Surrealism. Th Apocrypha describes several "Jakes," which are something like Discordian magic(k) spells intended to randomly baffle innocent bystanders (& minions of Greyface/cabbages) & create ultimately positive Eristic Vibrations. An example: mailing someone hundreds of identical sheep-shaped erasers anonymously, one at a time, with a written number on each mailing counting down from 203. (Oddly, this section claims to originate in th Summa Discordia, but I don't have it in my copy. I think th editor of my version of th Summa may have missed some things in tranferring th book from th internet to print.)

Th Apocrypha contains lots of unrelated ideas, like rules for Discordian card games, short silly parables, a luck spell, an intro to Discordian Magick, some alchemy, some interviews with fictional characters, & a description of a Discordian Tarot deck (no pics). A low point, in my opinion: some uninspired rants that don't necessarily reflect th positive spirit of Discordianism.

There's so much stuff in th Apocrypha that anyone interested in things Discordia will surely find something pleasant & amusing.

FNORD

FYI: All of these books can be found at Oh My Eris Dot Com, plus several other holybooks that I haven't gotten yet. In fact, there are at least a half dozen more listed there now than th last time I peeked. I imagine there are a few more gems & a few more bores. I'll let you know when & if I come across another of th former.

tiffoon day & morrow fly

Tiffany played her hour-long graduate bassoon recital this day (technically yesterday), April 1, which thus rocked this year for three good reasons. I proclaim myself thirsty for a glass of water.

Tiffany played good excellent.
I enjoyed it way lots.
Bassoons exude ultimo sexiness.

I fly on th aeroplane in th morrow (technically th today) & will dance about in Troy-town for a few days. I look forward to a silly spring breakus with localities & whatnots. Let's have magical tumblings & togethertastic atrocious monsters of id.

ON AN OILY MOON

I stopped by Mercury Cafe last night for th poetry open mic, & found out that I'd have a much larger & more attentive audience at this place if I were a poet & not a songwriter. Th whole scene amused me, & I'd consider returning. I read a thing I put together a few months back called ON AN OILY MOON. Of course, as at music open mics, I represented th only person doing something different from your typical American freeverse cliche. Which isn't to say that their stuff was "bad" & mine was "good," just that I didn't fit in.




ON AN OILY MOON

1

Stalk with orgasmic futility skies on an oily moon. Shrink skies, stalk butterflies! Butter stalk, shrink butterflies; skies, butter with orgasmic futility. Shrink butter on an oily moon! Butterflies (with orgasmic futility on an oily moon) stalk.

2

Pomegranate seeds, in the way of seeing the bandits hidden, seeing: wearing chain mail in the way of the bandits wearing chain mail. Pistols hidden, wearing chain mail, pomegranate seeds. The bandits' pistols, seeing pomegranate seeds, pistols in the way of hidden pomegranate seeds.

3

Sleeping through Sunday, a blind horse scatterings. Kimberly touches, sleeping through Sunday, thinks about a blind horse. Kimberly sleeping through Sunday scatterings, the sound of new hay. Kimberly thinks about the sound of new hay, touches scatterings, thinks about touches. A blind horse, the sound of new hay, sleeping through Sunday.

4

A panda exquisitely flees with rice. The president's imaginary daughter exquisitely with rice confuses, flees. A panda in Mexico confuses exquisitely in Mexico; the president's imaginary daughter flees! In Mexico, with rice, a panda confuses the president's imaginary daughter. A panda?

5

Butterflies: skies shrink, stalk on an oily moon butterflies with orgasmic futility. Skies stalk butter, shrink butterflies. Butter with orgasmic futility: shrink on an oily moon skies. Butter on an oily moon with orgasmic futility: stalk butterflies.

6

Scatterings: a blind horse sleeping through Sunday touches scatterings sleeping through Sunday. Thinks about, touches a blind horse, Kimberly, scatterings, the sound of new hay. Kimberly touches the sound of new hay, thinks about a blind horse. The sound of new hay sleeping through Sunday; Kimberly thinks about scatterings.

7

And fishes explosive, bent! And fishes in time cut Charlotte's legs! A lapel button and fishes, Charlotte's legs, explosive! A lapel button bent Charlotte's legs in time! Explosive cut, a lapel button in time, bent, cut, and fishes!

8

Exquisitely, with rice, confuses in Mexico, flees, confuses the president's imaginary daughter. In Mexico, a panda (the president's imaginary daughter), with rice (in Mexico exquisitely) - a panda confuses, exquisitely flees. A panda (with rice) flees the presdent's imaginary daughter, exquisitely.

9

The bandits seeing in the way of wearing chain mail? Hidden pomegranate seeds, pistols wearing chain mail seeing pomegranate seeds wearing chain mail? The bandits' pistols, in the way of hidden, seeing pistols hidden? The bandits in the way of pomegranate seeds? The bandits?

10

Bent and fishes, a lapel button explosive, cut in time explosive! Bent, cut, Charlotte's legs and fishes, in time bent a lapel button! Charlotte's legs, explosive and fishes, cut a lapel button! In time, Charlotte's legs bent!

11

On an oily moon, butter: shrink skies with orgasmic futility. Butter, butterflies stalk. Shrink with orgasmic futility on an oily moon, shrink, butterflies, on an oily moon. Skies stalk with orgasmic futility butterflies. Skies butter, stalk on an oily moon.

jamtech with Tim&Tony

Yesterday (DISCORD 11 - Discordians for Jesus Day / Love Your Neighbor Day) I did travel to th land of Park Forest, a southern suburb to play improvised tunes of wild happenings with two gentlemen who responded to th craigslist ad I posted recently: Tim & Toe Knee. Fun we did have in makings of musicks, & perhaps futures will coincide in some ways.

his saw which northampton

Mr. Weston gave her the history of the engagements at Enscombe, which "I never in my life saw a man more intent on being agreeable than Mr. --"The best of all. Granted;--for private enjoyment; and for private e It was rather too late in the day to set about being simple-minded and

FNORD

By th way, posts like this one come from bits of email spam that I receive. Although I usually enjoy email spam about as much as spam spam (=yuck), I make exceptions for randomized spametry such as th above.

FNORD

According to my account, I've written 400 entries in this blog - & this makes 401.

For copake do hill

falls in a year. At St. Petersburg, on the other hand, the quantity thus the unnatural war was still raging between the two brothers, Cleopatra, of this boy was Memphitis. His mother was very tenderly attached to him, a striking contrast to the exuberant prolificness of New Grenada. It is,

my ad on craigslist

I am a Chicagoan in seek of fellow ABSURDIST SONGWRITERS interested in:

CO-WRITING AVANT-GARDE POP MONSTROCITIES
thru such techniques as:

. . . randomly generating song elements from dice, playing cards, divination, etc.
. . . setting others' words to music - writing words to others' music (& vice versa).
. . . cutting up lyrics & song elements to recombine them in surprising ways.
. . . intuitive / "automatic" techniques of composition.
. . . constrained poetry (eg. palindromes, writing without the letter "e", etc.).
. . . writing songs/poems using surrealist techniques such as writing two lines & concealing the first, then giving the other person the page & having him/her do the same thing.
. . . converting non-musical phenomena into sound.

CREATING EAR-BENDING EXPERIMENTAL RECORDINGS
thru such techniques as:

. . . collecting sounds to use in unique ways.
. . . cutting up sounds randomly & reassembling them.
. . . separately recording different tracks to go with the same backing track & playing them together.
. . . improvising multi-layered pop songs from the ground up.

PERFORMING LIVE SHOWS
on the street, at open mics, at clubs
which feature (for example):

. . . group improvisation outside of "stylistic" limitations.
. . . live chance recombination of prepared material.
. . . live performance of musical "games".
. . . creating & performing on multiple instruments, including assemblages from "non-musical" paraphernalia, i.e. junk.
. . . mythical storytelling elements.
. . . dramatic (operatic!) elements such as costumes, characters & plots.
. . . performing absurdist rituals that involve the audience & players in unpredictable ways.

::

I'm not talking about a jam band or a free jazz combo. I'm talking about a vehicle of super-musical chaos worship.

I'm ready to try anything, & I'm looking for other people who are, too - People who revel in PARADOX - People who say nothing is true & everything is permitted - People who, in the area of making noise, are simultaneously RIDICULOUSLY SERIOUS & SERIOUSLY RIDICULOUS.

If some of what I've described excites you, then let's get together & see what we can do.

::

Contact: Andrew
315 657 6839
gtrpkt AT yahoo DOT com
http://www.myspace.com/nodalnim

Mojoday Milwaukee Ave Performa

'Twas yester on th street called Milwaukee Ave that yet again I exhibited tunes of Nimnitude for all to bear with. In celebratory fashion, I sang an hymn to many gods & th great Discordian Apostle Dr. Van Van Mojo, whilst all along distributing Pope, Saint & Messiah Cards to innocent-looking bywalkers. Here I show th doings:

.. I improvised a hymn to Ra, Isis, Horus, Demeter, Luna, Helios, Mercury, Baphomet, th Great Goddess, Mummu, Pan, Dr. Van Van Mojo, & of course Eris Kallisti Discordia [may her fiery totems ever elucidate].
.. hail Discordia
.. 2 G's
.. lov song 5
.. 25% mor monstr
.. stelr nursery > baby star
.. wil we go out together?
.. e blu apratus
.. ant lizard dragon man [lyrics by S. Marshalladoo]
.. brown dwarf star
.. lov song 1
.. how to ferment the colon
.. th posm [lyrics by J. Master Coolidge]
.. pungenday [daybyou]

Somewhere in there, I played a rottenbad attempt at th blues. Also rottenbad was my attempt to play th not-so-finished pungenday. All's well, though; I made $4.05.

Most folks enjoyed receiving news of their Popedom/Saintdom/Messiahdom. Who doesn't want to be a Discordian Holyone? No one, that's who!

A Discordious Mojoday, yo yo.

DR. VAN VAN MOJO

'Tis th fifth of Discord, a.k.a. Mojoday; we honor th Discordian voo doo meistro, th Apostle known as DR. VAN VAN MOJO in whatever way seems inappropriate. I may busk & improvise on streets Discordian melodies of irritation & anxiety, or I may nap. Right about now, urination sounds pretty good, so perhaps shall I pee in honor of Mojoday?

This paragraph constitutes an official "shout-out" to my Discordious brother Eric, who has sufficiently explained to me both heads & tails of his previous fnord which did grace my blooooog. Let's do wondermagic(k) in Troy-town, say?

I humbly suggest in th time of my being that folks band together for th doing of a Discordian tea ceremony in ways of ultimate.

5 from Apotheosis Psycherotica

5 excerpts from Apotheosis Psycherotica, a Discordian Fnordical.


~ from The Book of the Cryptic by Bryan Speigel ~

Chapter 4: Ducks
"Whaling can be a hard business,"
I said to the man as he engulfed a package of mints.
He turned and looked at me like a fish out of mud
then ran as if his bowels had congealed.


~ from The Book of Sex by Sarah Sinclair ~

Chapter 4: The Call to Arana
It is one thing to believe that lust and desire is for Arana, it is quite another matter to willfully and wontonly pursue her in fetish-sex, and receive fully her divine pleasure of Orgasm. While it is dogma that Arana issues a call to all beings, it is also dogma that most disregard that call. This is where the Normal falls to Normality and manifests his ugly apathy toward the love and awesome pleasure of Arana, turning instead toward the numbing death of Nothink.


~ from The Book of Funnel E. Funny by Sam the Butcher ~

Chapter 2: This again?
Oh plushy
plushy plushy plushy
Sitting on the shelf
soft and moist...
Hey! Who dumped water on my toys?
I'll smack the bitch-ho who did this!
Oh my poor plushy


~ from The Second Book of Chuff by Chuff ~

Chapter 13: Have an ice day!
For I am the great psychotic,
and I have spurted forth more words
to guide you toward enlightenment.
Go forth unto the public,
and confuse all who will be confused.
So suggests the ducks.


~ from The Book of K-Wac by Stillwell Stainal ~

Chapter 6: The Next Day
A cat jumped up into my lap.
"Hi, I'm Chuff's cat."
"Well, aren't you a nad-zoinker," said I.
"Dork."
She left.

Mercury OM 2 / Discordant Discord

Aloha, mein Freunden!

'Twas at Mercury Cafe on th night of yester that I did play Nimly things. I enjoyed times at place in doings.

.. glockenspiels [request]
.. ant lizard dragon man [lyrics by Scotthew McMarshalldrew]
.. stelr nursery > baby star > brown dwarf
.. Pablo
.. lov song 6

Friendlies George & Frank said th sound system exhibited special friendliness towards me & th Blue Demon, particularly in th area of ringing overtones of awesomeness. Fun enveloped.

FNORD

'Tis on this day th First of th Season of Discord, Discord 1, in th Year of Our Lady Of Discord 3173. Let us celebrate in joyfulship funhaving wonderpuppies! Let us eat, drink & be confounding! Let us Hail Eris Esoteric - may her fiery totems ever elucidate(!!!!!)

I hope to celebrate later today with a nap & some peanuts.

Hi oo lac!

April is Androse in ways.

Hi there.

Dumplings. I like that word.

Tickets have I ordered for the going on planes to Troy in time known as April 2 to April 8! 'Tis Chicago Public Schools' Spring Breakus, & I will do a visitation 'pon that time that will.

So friendlies will with Androse do friendlying perhapsit.

And so things dance.

I like my dice.

Also, I like thrift stores. I have bright yellowness in vestform.

Tiffany sings a lullaby to th cat in th other room. I find this strange. Now she deposits th cat upon my shoulders & commenses to shower, & so I shall continue blogging.

That I do.

Perhaps not much to say have I. Th weather's nice & I miss riding my bike, Suzanne, who broke months ago & has sat in my kitchen.

I just finished reading Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are dead, which I did yes enjoy. A play, we can call it, much in th same vein as Waiting for Godot, which I also read recentlyish. In soon future times, I may do readings 'pon plays by Euripides, my favorite of th classical Greek dramatists. For fifty cents did I purchase six plays by him at stores of thrift.

On Friday past, George & I & others saw a so-so show at th Empty Bottle, a neat underground club nearby. I enjoyed doing stuff, even if I found th band somewhat lacking. It would benefit me to read less & get out more, I think, especially in upcoming times of weathertastic nicefulness.

And so things dance.

I hope all do doings in wellness & I say hi & so forth & such.

a

electricks

I'm not sure th doings I will in musicks in soon times do. An offer exists for me to play a show if I do something electronic. However, my electronics remain stunted by computer limitations, I do think.

Other thoughts sit. I'd like to sing musicks to other people's words, as is th sometimes-doing. All friendlies, everywhere, send me your words for th singing, if you wanna! It sits in mind to do these things.

North av & junction

I busked at two locations today, I do dare mention. Th first was North Ave in Wicker Park/Bucktown, yessiree. I played:

1 .. levl 1
2 .. lov song 5
3 .. 2 G's
4 .. stelr nursery > baby star
5 .. vejtbls u'v nevr herd of
6 .. Deenmark
7 .. I am systms
8 .. ant lizard dragon man [lyrics by Scotthew]
9 .. chupacabra
10 .. main sequence star
11 .. lov song 1
12 .. cal it Home
13 .. th posm [lyrics by J. Coolidge]
14 .. fists of smite
15 .. th slipry toad
16 .. prickle-prickle

Then at th intersection of North, Milwaukee & Damen, I played:

17 .. sience
18 .. hail Discordia
19 .. Lucretia
20 .. lov song 6
21 .. 5 songs of fish
22 .. Pablo
23 .. Maroon Dots

During Set I I made $4.52; during Set II I made $3.00. Neither of those sets individually beat my limit of $5.00 per set; however, th total is $7.52, which does beat five.

My fingers are cold & it's going to be a cold walk home, eh?

I like this, though. As it gets warmer, I will continue to busk & report back to you, friendlies.

Much love,
Androse th Nodal Nim

thus

Continuing to work at th same school, same class; continuing to study th tarot; battling a cold; blessing Egyptian gods every day; catching some great &or amusing movies; eating lots of popcorn; pondering electronic Nimliness.

monsterously adorable bird-things

Did you know that scientists think that good ol' Velociraptor had feathers & might technically receive classification as a bird?!



Also, here is a particularly cute relative of th Velociraptor, Deinonychus, also feathered:



More relatives: th Dromaeosaurus:



Achillobator:

Mercury OM 1

Hi & yes & hello. I indeed forgot to mention th latest in open mic happenings of late in lateness-time. Two days prior to this day (Wednesday, a.k.a. Prickle-Prickle) I did Nimmings 'pon th stage of happenings at Mercury Cafe, a place that is. At such time, I played among two others & did meetings of a gentleman named Frank whilst drinking a tea called King Crimson. Let it be known that I enjoyed th doings of th evening & would return to th place of th doings.

Here are th bits:

.. how to ferment the colon
.. 5 songs of fish
.. chupacabra
.. vejtbls u'v nevr herd of
.. prickle-prickle [indeed it was prickle-prickle this time]

This coffee house I do make enjoyments of, as it locates 'pon th route of my goings. Coffee I often get in mornings. Today, a song didst play 'pon th stereo of th place & thus did I recognize it to be Mellotron by Porcupine Tree & I thought of friendlies.

I dreamed that I ingested a strong hallucinogen in th form of mustard-butter & then got a haircut.

If any bodies think of soon-visits, I have a mandatory week off from April 2 to 6. If no visits do doings, I may indeed spend times singing muchly on streets of Chi-town wearing ties & hats.

That alls.

day of 4

Hi.

My fourth day of submarining in th same class comes to an end in a short while, as I type away at th absent teacher's computer & such. Things have gone pretty well today, & at this moment, they play gym. After tomorrow, I can identify this as my first 5-day week since beginning submarining in general. I will appreciate suchness when upon my doorstep does arrive my checky.

FNORD

Of late, I do study th tarot, for it seems interesting as a symbol-system for fun-having & life-processing & other such hyphenated phrases. My studies do take place upon th website identified as learntarot.com. I take notes & do thinkings. I own not a deck at this time.

Place of doing in future times with femur.

Me: You do good work, but you sometimes get distracted. You have to try harder to keep working hard even when other students are talking to you and making noise.
Kid: I get distracted because I hear voices.
Me: Yes, the other students can be distracting, but you can work harder to ignore them.
Kid: No, not other students. I hear voices in my head.
Me: Oh. . . ok, well. . . that can be distracting, too. . . .

FNORD

I find myself in the interesting position of filling in for a teacher who may be absent from school for three to six weeks due to a broken femur. This is a special education school, special for a variety of very special reasons, a school I've been to a lot & enjoy - endlessly weird & complex & chaotic. After my second day with this class, I can say I think so far, things are going pretty smoothly.

There are six kids (although I'm told that one of them never comes), all boys, all at different levels of maturity, cognitive functioning & social confusion. I get along with them & they seem to respect me. It's a good thing. We're going to be together for a while. I consider it quite fortunate that I have an excellent teacher aide in the class with me, experienced & ready for anything. Together, we will kick bottom.

Such is things.

FNORD

I have new glasses.

virtue

founded upon the divine right of beauty (and full as good a divine right "Lexicon," where I found a word that puzzled me, and which I did not One word only as to swearing, and that, I hope and believe, is more than some virtue, which some in company notoriously want or declaim against

FNORD

for a man becomes more and more easily moved to virtue, however on. But in the case of alteration it may be argued that the process also, for the most part at least, in the case of secondary substances; or four cubits. It is used, moreover, with regard to apparel, a man

FNORD

the place call, and acknowledge to be, good company, notwithstanding some the putting on and pulling off your hat genteelly, are the material parts one company what you hear in another. Things, seemingly indifferent, may, treat the whole company this being one of the very few cases in which

Eris is with her.

Milwaukee Ave again to happen did.

Up to our elbows in all sorts simply nine-legged
shucking devils
sweater cryogenic vacuum

FNORD

In beauteous warmth of Ra-given sun-sunniness (how very sun-sunni 'twas in day), I didst (diddlums) playt mine mandolin (recently fnorded) on th Avenue above indicated in title-barns. I will do a telling.

'Twas some songs like these that mine mando didst spil 'pon th asphalts:

.. how to ferment th colon
.. 5 songs of fish
.. lov song 5
.. chupacabra
.. prickle-prickle [a daybyou]
.. vejtbls u'v nevr herd of
.. troglodyt
.. Lucretia
.. fists of smite
.. hulo, wil u be my Sheep?
.. cal it Home
.. lov song 6

I earned $4.88 in american monies & some uncountable dozens of smiles from pretty girls. Thanks to Ra & Eris & Such for th funposity. I daybyoud a song called prickle-prickle in honor of th Discordian day of th week whose name is that. (I intend to write one for th other 4 days, etc.) Th rules, naturally, were going to be that I can only write &or perform th songs on their respective days, but I'm proud to say that quite by accident (& in rapt Discordian fashion) I blatently & with obtuse cluelessness defied th rules I myself set by performing (daybyouing, even!) prickle-prickle on a boomtime.

Not that anyone cares.

Chaoflux, ya'll.

I hope y'all're having a joy-joy-joygasmic Chaoflux in this here Season of Chaos in th Year of Our Lady of Discord 3173! 'Tis a Setting Orange, so find something Orange to do to celebrate. My plan was to celebrate th Chaoflux by releasing th first issue of th Great Book of Befuddlement (whose cover was to be orange), but instead, I'm postponing its release so it can be bigger, badder, & more befuddling for All. Maybe I'll release it on th first of Discord, or maybe some other lovely Discordian date. But durnnit, I shall release!

I recommend th book Prometheus Rising & also th Illuminatus! Trilogy for all with eyes for th seeing. Th Wisdomatics Inherent do doings in my brain.

Do you like th new way of appearance of this blog of Androse? I never thought it would happen, but somehow I got weary of looking at poop-green. 'Tis dots that be.

p.s. For Eros do give upon mine blog fnords, which are like comments but better. It is th loving wu-wei.

ancient history, in general

ancient history, in general, as other people, do that is, not to be upon your guard. The value of moments, when cast up, is immense, if well impertinently retail in all companies, in hopes of passing for scholars. shops, drolls, tumblers, rope-dancers, and 'hoc genus omne': but inform

Eris Rox

Goddess (mhftee) is working her chaotic wondermagick in Chicago today! It's been snowing for well over 24 hours, th streets are awful, & for some confusing reason th folks in charge decided that school will be in session all across th city, but (a.) students don't have to go (b.) there are no busses running (c.) students should go to their "neighborhood schools," which means, not necessarily th schools they actually attend.

So I'm at a school with 12 students in it. Th teachers who are here (many didn't come) are babysitting (or just sitting around getting paid for nothing - what a silly waste of money). Oddly, I'm filling in for a secretary (I'm pretty sure this is absolutely not what subs are supposed to do - might not be legal), helping out by taking calls, filling out attendance forms, putting mail in teacher mailboxes, etc. What a weird day.

A teacher commented on how peaceful it is with twelve students - none of th ordinary chaos. Indeed. A brand new dimension of chaos today! How delightful!

say th hello hi th hi to thee
greetings to friendly

that is good is cookies
welcome & divine division Discord
how do you do
say th hello hi th hi to thee
love to mirror eyes only centrifugal force

French members
my oats & yours

from being to burning stew
omnibus
how do you do
oblique doctor arrow kisses grandbaby
oblique doctor arrow kisses grandbaby

upon pear Bern oval singing game
that is good is cookies

pumice th bean scrumpling
omnibus
good volumes of Erisian Wines
th divinity tergiversate hourglass hello
hi

pomegranate skunk
pumice th bean scrumpling

inetchaoshooky

(a)Tiffany got internet back & (b)I took a day off. Related statements, yes, but I also got zero hours of sleep prior to 7-ish am, an event also contributing to B. I write to share strange links to strange (mostly Discordian & Chaotic) things:

Apikorsus
discordian.com
Umamerican Activities
A Discordian Coloring Book
Museum of Bad Art

Coextensive with everything? How could they know?
His sightless eyes horribly watch the air;
Traces of those deep cuts lie thickly upon
Nor, indeed, the bit of paint itself can know of.
What? What can you do?
Place of absorbing snow, itself to be
Dismal, endless plain—
Partly stone, partly the absence of stone,
From there. Toward . . .
To run, as in the time of the bee, seeking
Sits at the limit of a kind of world
Come, swallows, it's good-bye.
That only you and I can know. Les deux
References
Across the heavens' gray.
Only whirled snow heaped up by whirled snow,
And off the white smoke swims
Yes. You'd want that said, (if you
wonders if she'd ever be brave enough

Also.

Let it be known that at least one Chicago youth is certainly a member of th Bavarian Illuminati.

I subbed a third grade art class today, & said student set about to draw a dollar bill, & in doing so he drew first a rectangle to contain th essense of dollarhood, & then th quite terrifying Great Seal of th United States of America, th Pyramid-&-Eye symbol. Th students around him made comments illustrating their confusion - why would someone draw a pyramid on a dollar? Why indeed.

Clearly, th student does th doings of th Bavarian Illuminati, whose symbol th Pyramid-&-Eye truly is.

My solution to this epidemic: FNORD thine dollars - in pen, do write FNORD on th Great Seal of every dollar that crosses your path, thus nullifying ill effects of Illuminism & pooping on Greyface.

FNORD!

Good News!

Jesus loves you!

Just kidding - of course he doesn't.

Actually, th good news is this: I finally memorized by library card number(!!!!!)

With Pats on Back of Self,
Androse th Nim, faKr of th Flum

FNORD

OK, I'm back with more good news. I have sort of finished th first issue of th Great Book of Befuddlement! I intend verily (warning: gratuitous split infinitive ahead) to stupendously release it on Chaoflux, a great Discordian holyday of muchos Greatnesses (I'm learning Spanish!). Here follows a tentative schedule of GBoB releases in future times to come:

.. issue #1 .. Chaos 19 - Chaoflux a.k.a. feb 19 a.k.a two weeks from yesterday
.. issue #2 .. Chaos 73 - Einstein Day a.k.a mar 14
.. issue #3 .. Discord 23 - Jake Day a.k.a. apr 6
.. issue #4 .. Discord 46 a.k.a. apr 29
.. issue #5 .. Discord 69 a.k.a. may 22

So it goes.

(Each issue release comes 23 days after th previous.)

I continue to invite submissions. Th price per issue I have not determined, but I will set it low. I will do mailings & we can work out a subscription system for faraway ladies & lads of Erisian wildlies.

ALL HAIL DISCORDIA

Stuff.

With George & Tiffany, this past weekend I did see two marvelous concerts: on Friday, th Chicago Symphony Orchestra performed Th Rite of Spring magnificently, & on Saturday, 'twas th lovely & marvelous band Deerhoof at a nice Chicago venue called th Metro doing great things of music wondermagic(k).

'Twas that.

I find myself poor, not working enough, & not so crazy about substitute teaching. I have some good days, though. Today, I'm with a sixth grade class of relatively pleasant & amusing folks. They finished all their work about an hour ago (it was too easy for them), & now they're watching a movie, playing games on th two computers in th room, & reading. Some days kill me, though. I don't think I agree with th attitude of education in this country in general. We try to raise a bunch of robots, & th ones that won't go with it (they shouldn't) are th ones that get screwed.

FNORD

I've almost finished th first issue of th Great Book of Befuddlement, my Discordian Zine-in-progress. I like how it's coming out. It's a lot of work, though; if I don't get a few local people interested in reading it & contributing to it within three issues or so, I may not keep it up. As I have mentioned, Readers & Friends, your contributions to this project are quite welcome.

Squisky Horbs,
Episkopos Androse th Nim, faKr of th Flum

yaargh

Schools of hellbringing brought their hellbringings to bear upon my head this week that comes to a close at this time (tomorrow, the Friday, there is no school for anyone anywhere [un-collegy-like] in this Illuminati-controlled township). It seems true that I survived. You wouldn't believe the comb-over on the guy standing next to me at this moment. It exhibits fantastic qualities of awkwardness and insanity (there should be a word for awkward and insane together as one).

[[Insaneward seems a good nonce word for the having, but not in that meaning, maybe.]]

FNORD

I played some acoustic guitar and mandolin today for the first time in a goodly while. No news songs did I write or anything of that nature [the time will come in time]. I have continued preparations for a zine, and a zine will I assemble in dueness of time, one that celebrates the awesomeness of Eris (mhftee) and her wondermagicks and totems and clay boils. Fellow Discordians in Chicago and elsewhere, I do invite thee to submit loving members for the goodness of all good things.

((Those seeking the immediate Erisian date will now know that some Discordians call it Setting Orange, Chaos 25.))

FNORD

In my car, as I was allowing it to nicely warm while I grabbed CDs from the apartment, I did drop keys, and one went quite very missing until I considered the possibility that it had fallen into the cuff of my pants. I found it there when I looked and suddenly felt very smart.

I consider that the high point of my day.

FNORD FNORD

Someone should let Nathan know that Luciano Berio wrote a sequenza for accordion, and it rocks lots.

Those things I think of saying to you now.

-a

ALL HAIL DISCORDIA

As vendor

have no intermediate, one or the other must needs be present in the psychic states which are not inborn, but arise from the concomitance individual not. Thus knowledge, as a genus, is explained by wings, but qua winged creature. If, then, the statement is made

a school I like

There exists one. I've gone to't thrice. I shall (it seems) regularly do submarining on Fridays there, for a teacher who on all Fridays shall be absent. Today I did other-room yet same-school submarining. I like't. I only wish I could speak the second language of SPANISH that one finds of importance.

Nothing too new or interesting or interesting or new. Zine? Maybe so. It continues to delight me in ways to think of. I wonder when I'll get paid again and whether I'll be able to pay bills in goodness. Maybe so.

Much love and iron filings.

Happy Pat Pineapple Day (if you choose to celebrate)

It amuses me to tell you that at this moment, Chaos 18 (Pat Pineapple Day it seems), at 8:28 AM (there's no alternative Discordian hour system that I know of), I find myself sitting in the media room of a Chicago school amidst a class of perfectly quiet students all causing no trouble at all. Some days, my job makes me want to kill and die (maybe I should go to Iraq). But today, I find it pleasant and wonderful.

On the other hand, I left the book I really want to read in a closet in the office. I'd rather be reading that than talking to you bozos.

(I say that with the utmost love for you bozos.)

~a th nn

subdate & Erisomatics

By the by, subbing has felt less unpleasant lately. Yesterday, I subbed second grade at a very cool little magnet school for little math-heads(=yay!). On the other hand, I've been receiving fewer calls; today and last Wednesday, they didn't call me in. Work isn't guaranteed, but it does kind of suck not to get it.

---

In other news, I've been brainstorming for an original pseudo-shamanistic Discordian Zine! I have lots of ideas rolling around. Let me share five of them:

1. Discordian weather forecasts: .. Magnets, with an 87% Chance of Iron Filings .. Cold Showers and Screaming .. Void .. 30% Chance of Survival .. Pungent Erisomatic Wind Bits.
2. The I, Chicken, a Discordian divination system involving tossing pog-like icons of chickens (which you cut out of the zine with scissors or lasers) and reading your fortune from the results. Bonus points if hairs from your carpet or floor get stuck on your chicken pogs.
3. The Holy Limerick.
4. The Golden Tongue of Eris, another cut-out (I'll make a page of cut-outs in every issue) which you carry around with you and put near your brain, so Eris can gradually devour you. This is for new member initiation.
5. Erisomatic Astrology. The POEE calendar, supplied in the first and holiest of Discordian documents, the Principia Discordia, provides ingredients for an easy way to determine a person's Discordian "sign". I suggest you simply add the element for the day of the week you were born on (Sweetmorn: Sweet; Boomtime: Boom; Pungenday: Pungent; Prickle-Prickle: Prickle; Setting Orange: Orange) with the season you were born in (Chaos; Discord; Confusion; Bureaucracy; Aftermath) for a total of 25 possible signs. My sign (and also Eric Fauss', Beckey Dewing's and Brian Cavanaugh's) would be Orange Confusion. George's would be Pungent Discord. What's your sign??

Then, I would write new fortunes for each sign in each issue.

And those are five of my ideas at this moment.

All Hail Eris Esoteric, May Her Fiery Totems Ever Elucidate!

---

P.S. Friends and Comrades are all welcome to contribute to the upcoming Zine! I think everything absurd and/or surreal could be made to fit. I'm going to put randomized poetry, drawings and things in there. (I think the Great Wisdomatics would fit splendidly.) I hope to have regular contributions from other people; I just need to find the people and get them interested.

More fun with Discordian Holydays!

This Thursday (known Eristically as Pungenday -- date: Chaos 18, Year of Our Lady of Discord 3173), a few Discordians here and there celebrate Pat Pineapple Day. It seems that such a day celebrates a mascot of a particular Discordian sect with which I am not familiar, one by the certain name of Pat Pineapple. This is nice if you know it/him/her. Since I don't (but want to celebrate anyway), I will interpret "pat" as a verb.

Therefore, I see it as every Discordian's duty to pat a pineapple this Thursday.

Additionally, let it be known that this Sunday (known Eristically as Sweetmorn -- date: Chaos 21, YOLD 3173) some Discordians celebrate Hug Day. This website describes this day thus:

Hug your friends. Hug your loved ones. Confound your enemies by offering them a hug. Hugs are free, hugs are healthy, hugs are good. Which is why they may be illegal in some jurisdictions.

ERIC !! (& Gallery Cabaret OM 3)

Eric the Fauss didst visit, and fun occurred in many layers and such. We walked about, saw objects, birthed conversation, gamed. With his cooking muscles, the good Eric didst cook. (Vodka sauce and matza ball soup, indeedy.) Chicago welcomed him within its beautiful urban stinky-walls.

I tell you of the songs I played when we didst attend the open mic at Gallery Cabaret:

.. chupacabra
.. how to ferment the colon
.. lov song 5 > 25% mor monstr

more jolly spam

accurate if we coined some word like ruddered as the correlative to lance, to cauterize, action; to be lanced, to be account of the nature of an individual tree will give a more This is likewise the case with regard to perception: for the

---

terms applied to them, indeed can all those kinds of quantity that species or the genus that we appropriately define any individual The term affective quality is not used as indicating that those all cases that correlatives come into existence simultaneously. The
that which is less; by less, less than that which is greater. will be health and no disease, and again, if everything turns white, by certain permanent and lasting affections, are called affective a relative, there would be a reciprocity of relation between it and
It is the mark of substances and of differentiae that, in all secondary sense those things are called substances within which, as neither of the aforesaid statements holds good. For it is not or animal? It has none. Nor can the species or the genus have a
themselves qualities, and are not relative. Further, if anything evident by reference to particular instances which occur. Animal Now the head, the hand, and such things are substances, and it is the name, but also the definition, applies to the subject: we should
the adjectives white, grammatical, just, and so on. obtain. Yet when one of the two contraries is a constitutive Quantity is either discrete or continuous. Moreover, some quantities quantity, the terms great and small indicate relation, for they
variation of degree can be predicated. The category of quantity, the two contraries, not one or the other, should be present in the correlatives to one another, ii as contraries to one another, is used. Things are said to be opposed in four senses: i as
identity, unless indeed one of the contraries is a constitutive to have such and such a habit as regards knowledge, yet they are true of many other things, such as quantity. There is nothing that relative thing, he will also definitely apprehend that to which it
particular thing is relative, assuming that we call that a relative in substance itself that a substance is said to be capable of admitting to withstand disintegration; softness, again, is predicated of a thing To sum up, it is a distinctive mark of substance, that, while
into existence. Again, if all animals ceased to exist, there would other things, but it is not necessary that either the one quality or be true and the other false, for when he is not yet able to acquire

Chicago hello

Again, Chicago envelopes me in its beautiful urban stinky-walls. I do like it here; my life weirds. I worked twice this week: yesterday with second graders and today with fourth. Tomorrow, I've been invited to return to today's school to continue assisting a teacher. I don't know how helpful or necessary I act in the position, and I suspect CPS would not find it legit to use a sub as a teacher aide (rather than a replacement for someone absent), but I shall plan to return. Eric of Fauss visits on the Day of Thurs.

FNORD

Also! tomorrow (in case I forget to tell you) [some of] we Discordians have declared it Backwards Day, Reformed and/or Binary Day:

[This info I steal from discordia.loveshade.org]

FNORD

January 10 (10 Chaos): Backwards Day, Reformed (more properly, demrofeR, yaD sdrawkcaB) (O)/(DD). Day to do things backwards. Walk backwards, dress backwards, talk backwards. (Driving backwards on a busy freeway is not recommended. In some jurisdictions, it’s not advisable to wear a back-less dress or thong bikini backwards. But it could be fun). Doing or wearing things inside out or upside down also count. Check your favorite recordings for backwards masking. Pray to sirE. Hate what you love, love what you hate. This is also a good day to switch positions with a superior or inferior as described for April Fool’s Day. Children can tell their parents, “Go clean your room and do your homework,” and parents can tell their children, “If you don’t eat your dessert, you won’t get any vegetables.” Unless, of course, that’s your usual pattern. (Note that we chose this date as Backwards Day because both the Gregorian and Discordian Dates can be written as 01 10 or 10 01, both of which are the same backwards.)

January 10 (10 Chaos): Binary Day (DD). For those who recognize January 26 as Backwards Day. It’s basically the same holiday, but focuses more on the bi part.

FNORD

OH aah

If anybody would like the knowing of this, I exist at this moment in Austinburg, OH, where my mother and I have come for the getting of my blue automobile. Tomorrow morn, off we go for car-getting, then I away to Chicago and she aways to Troy. That is that.

There's a computer here in the lobby of the Comfort Inn, so I've decided to leave a semi-pointless sort of blog entry for all. After all, I've never blogged in Ohio.

I miss Troy already, but also Chicago. I have sticky bits in both places.

Yes.

Grind OM 38

.. 5 songs of fish
.. drone

[both with Dave]

Happy Mung Day, yous guys!

We pretty Discordians celebrate on this here datum, Chaos 5 (in the Year of Our Lady of Discord 3173 and all other years of said) the apostle known chiefly as HUNG MUNG.

From the Principia Discordia:

HUNG MUNG
A Sage of Ancient China and Official Discordian Missionary to the Heathen Chinese. He who originally devised THE SACRED CHAO. Patron of the Season of Chaos. Holyday: Jan 5.


See for self the o-so-holiest thing thing:



How do Discordians celebrate such a day? It is not known.

On this particular Mung Day, I and my mother will travel to Ashtabula, Ohio, where my car lies waiting for us to claim it with joy. It has (supposedly) been fixed (not like kitties, but like cars), and that is good. On the day that doth follow (Chaos 6, 3173 YOLD), I will scuttle home to Chicago, and mine mom with scuttle home to Troy.

My Xmas visit thus ends.

Much love to all,
Androse the Nodal Nim

spoil and rebelled against ward at hast killed him; of

approach to the seventeenth year that twofold more. Then Must

The Season of Chaos

Let it be known upon the masses of knowledge-thought-humans that it has come to be the Season of Chaos in the POEE Calendar Year 3143. Yes. Indeed, it is the third day of the Season of Chaos: a Pungenday (named from the element PUNGENT).

An excerpt from the great Principia Discordia, which serves as the holy book for those called Discordians who worship at the toes of Eris, follows below. I have made bold the section specific to this season.

DOGMA I - METAPHYSICS #2, "COSMOLOGY"* THE BOOK OF UTERUS from the Honest Book of Truth revealed to Lord Omar 1. Before the beginning was the Nonexistent Chao, balanced in Oblivion by the Perfect Counterpushpull of the Hodge and the Podge. 2. Whereupon, by an Act of Happenstance, the Hodge began gradually to overpower the Podge -- and the Primal Chaos thereby came to be. 3. So in the beginning was the Primal Chaos, balanced on the Edge of Oblivion by the Perfect Counterpullpush of the Podge and the Hodge. 4. Whereupon, by the Law of Negative Reversal,** the Podge swiftly underpowered the Hodge and Everything broke loose. 5. And therein emerged the Active Force of Discord, the Subtle Manifestation of the Nonexistent Chao, to guide Everything along the Path back to Oblivion - that it might not become lost among Precepts of Order in the Region of Thud. 6. Forasmuch as it was Active, the Force of Discord entered the State of Confusion, wherein It copulated with the Queen and begat ERIS, Our Lady of Discord and Gross Manifestation of the Nonexistent Chao. 7. And under Eris Confusion became established, and was hence called Bureaucracy; while over Bureaucracy Eris became established, and was hence called Discordia. 8. By the by it came to pass that the Establishment of Bureaucracy perished in a paper shortage. 9. Thus it was, in accord with the Law of Laws. 10. During and after the Fall of the Establishment of Bureaucracy was the Aftermath, an Age of Disorder in which calculation, computations, and reckonings were put away by the Children of Eris in Acceptance and Preparation for the Return to Oblivion to be followed by a Repetition of the Universal Absurdity. Moreover, of Itself the Coming of Aftermath waseth a Resurrection of the Freedom-flowing Chaos. HAIL ERIS! 11. Herein was set into motion the Eristic Pattern, which would Repeat Itself Five Times Over Seventy-three Times, after which nothing would happen.

Note that on the fifth day of this, the Season of Chaos, which is Setting Orange (named from the element ORANGE) and also Friday, we Discordians celebrate Mungday in honor of the honorable apostle known as Hung Mung. Let us each enjoy a nice friendly festive feast of friendly pleasure on Mungday, as Eris would have us do with her fiendish Discordian wiles and sauces.

Great Wisdomatics

Inspired, perhaps, by the glorious Lapsang Souchang wonderfullized by the Daily Grind in TroyNY, AmyBethNick&I made Great Wisdomatics in the fields of goodly maths & erotic maths for to maybe someday find musictacular uses in the doings. I provide for you below some lovely & remarkable excerpts from the Great Wisdomatics:

---

Great Wisdomatics of Nick.

4 + delta = hamburger

if your apricot is yellow then yes please!

19 is the sin of your mind cabbage

6 + 19 = pee pee toucher

---

Great Wisdomatics of Amy.

toes sometimes always have feet unless goats fly above in the stratosphere.

if goggle + feet = skort then lobbsters have toes
if there are toes then there is a high fingertip ratio
therefore by the transitive property of equality skorts have a high fingertip ratio

globby(globby + glu) + peeeee(fingertips)globby^2 + globby glu + peeefingertips

---

Great Wisdomatics of Beth.

2. feet pud

3. o'er fungus piles = the function of juxtaposed ninnies inside a walrus carcass inside Joey inside Joey if he were a Siamese twin having Joey inside inside inside the frequency of ghost intercourse two hundred fifty nine fold

5. humping geological carcasses = brothers of inebriation on top of the lady = humping cannibalistic lactaid = penetration of Susan B Anthony = erect wondermagick

---

Great Wisdomatics of me.

nine hundreds of wine is metal
scratching of six times is bellow
pummelling the x sub bathtub is quail
therefore gloves

tri-dangle plus bi-centaurian over rectumble
equals or doesn't one-teen Q
penta-grape of wax hexcapades minus negative well-hung butter squid equals the cucumber root of ape
nine is nine scumwards

Scotthew & Nim on the Day of 1

Mr. Good Scott Marshall and the Nim that is me made a bit of an album on the first of this year, and experienced lots of that called fun:

BE OUR VERY HAPPY FRIENDLY.

Scott & Androse poetics

i.

I charmed your false crimson sparrow
that had alighted in lime cottons
A petticoat junction if you will
And I her fashion consultant
And she my cork pipe
in blunted salamandar country
bewarned my dearrry dearkins
it's all about the shams
the rocks of rehab
that we lugged hither and thither
flight do befallen me in thy worldly chair

ii.

Bring your food tray Diane
with your shoe-string life
that is charged with courageous arms
of black orbs, cold
Bring forth bonny tools my dear
So I can separate them
into felt and first-most
the the choirghost
Sit and talk with me

iii.

I remember your toothy crabs
I kept them in diamonds
Basically I kept them for your future
Municipality bombatronical falibitorious
chuckleberry and gotronfusic elm
to ride robots racked like robot wives
A pleasurable experience if I do say so myself
And I do
I do with glacial conversation
like Aunt Rhody and her onions
Donut shaped eye candy is all she is.

iv.

Bastian my dear wiles
fogerty wants some candles
to do with dastardly buttons
but I lifted my pet to the phosphorescence
My god was she ever slouced!
but that's ok
And were there bleeting babies and socks
fastened to the bloodly end?
me?
or it might be you who is uncontrolled
or it might be Cindy Lauper.

v.

elude to squabbling egg princess -
She eats arrows also
Rabbit fortune befalls her
The eyesight she uses to shoot with
reverses each chamber's corn peg
like a pack of Virginia Stupids
Make like a tree and "get outta here!"
Ya gosh darn man worm
of forlorn principles!

vi.

Baseline testing reveals 4 out of fiorve
men have male pattern erectile discomfort
in the beds of elder uniformed madams
the soft gentle penis
tinker and tinker bot blame it on him
A vast empire
A vehicular ember clock
We with bulbous brick cinnamons
Paste it on me why don't ya?
Callous hands and bacon grinds
And subterranean rubbing beans

Grind OM 37

.. glockenspiels
.. how to ferment the colon

Great to return and play a set, 'twas!

Nodal Nim at Slow Jed's!!

Thanks to everyone who came! You rock! I hope you had lots and lots of fun!

Act i

.. cal it Home
.. stelr nursery
.. brown dwarf [selected by audience over red dwarf]
.. th slipry toad
.. ant lizrd dragn man
.. fists of smite
.. drone
.. 5 songs of fish
.. lov song 1

Act i.v

Nathan Stodola played many a lovely tune!

Act ii

.. how to ferment the colon
.. 2G's
.. cuckooing brainstem [premiere]
.. bean [premiere]
.. vejtbls u'v nevr herd of [request]
.. Lucretia
.. Maroon Dots [request]
.. to think of WTM
.. sience
.. hail Discordia
.. hulo, wil u be my Sheep?
.. main sequence star [preview]
.. planetary nebula [preview]
.. wite dwarf star [preview]

Act ii.v

Nathan played many a lovely tune, then together, we played:

.. Io [by Nathan Stodola]
.. 25% mor monstr
.. lov song 5
.. No One Lives Forever [by Oingo Boingo]
.. So Long and Thanks for All the Fish [from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy]

Mudhouse OM 8

Hi there!

Open mic I did in Averill Park, a warm-up for tomorrow evening. 'Twas good fun, and I thank Dave and Casey for hosting lovlily as always. Here were the songs that sprang forth from my mando and self:

.. how to ferment the colon
.. th posm [request]
.. glockenspiels [request]

journey and incident in Ohio

Hello, all!

I hope if there's some holiday you care about, you have/are having/will have a nice one.

(As for me, I kept my general humbuggery to myself on the day of Xmas. My immediate family likes to get together, eat and exchange gifts. I have no problem with that. As long as Jesus stays out of things, Xmas is rather pleasant.)

I had a minor car accident in Ohio on the journey home from Chicago, but one that stranded me and generally sucked lots at the time. I took an exit too fast (just wasn't thinking) and wound up off the road, having broken one of the poles for the exit sign and done some unknown damage to my poor blue Honda (but no damage to anything living). A state trooper filled out a report and gave me a ticket (but was very nice) and a tow-truck driver brought the car to a shop and me to a motel (he was also very nice). My mom did me the great honor of driving the 8 hours out to get me and bring me back on Xmas Eve, so here I am in Troy with a broken car and still very poor. Ah well.

So I have no idea how long I'll be here, etc. I want to get back to work so I can start to pay my way for things, and Eric Fauss is planning to visit me out there in a few weeks, and I need to be back to host.

Oy vey.

-

But come to my show on Thursday and say hello! Lots of fun will we have!

-a

UPCOMING: Nodal Nim at the Mudhouse !!

Holy Toledo!

Nodal Nim returns to the Park of Averill! Be my lovely friendly at the place that I will be! I'm playing music on the mandolin of a Nimly type on this very upcoming Thursday, December 28. I begin my fervent strums at seven o'clock. It is true!

At the time indicated above, I will be here:

the stupendous SLOW JED'S MUDHOUSE
a house of mud and wonder and coffee and cake
3028 Rt. 43 - Averill Park, NY - 12018
the cost of visiting is utterly nothing at all
slowjeds.com

I will share goodtimes with all who dare to visit!

I will sell new mini-CDs for two dollars of money!

I will play the old favorites of fish, vegetables, monsters!

I will play zany post-Chicago songs no one has heard ever ever!

Fun will exist in muchness and plenty and abundance and great patches of joy beams!

-Androse

burrito and the mystery of 7

Things are well in the teaching of substitution that takes place. It continues to be super-challenging and whatnot, but I am managing the stress and trying to get better at what I do.

I got paid for my first two days of work, and that rocks bunches. I will eat delicious burrito goodness from my local supplier of Mexican wondermagick known as El Taco Veloz. Those that visit the Androse will experience the wondermagick that is.

Also, I can do laundry now. That is good, too, quite.

I had seventh grade today and last Friday. Difficult classes, but I liked them anyway. Seventh grade rocks.

I do betterings.

Yes.

I returned to submarining today. It was not hell and it was not joyfully excellent. It was enjoyable at times and very frustrating at times. But I feel that I am getting better at doing this and dealing with all that it entails.

This is the most challenging thing I've ever done in my life.

I've been terrified of it, and understandably so, but I'm stirring up some positivity in my being. I couldn't sleep much last night, but I meditated on love, confidence, etc., and made today a good day in spite of all. I did not kill anyone, and no one killed me.

Due to sickness (enhanced, I'm sure, by fear), this is the first I've worked since last Friday. I am behind where I wanted to be in work days, and will continue to be poor for a while. I anticipate eagerly being able to afford burritos and compact discs. With any luck, in a month or a few of working, I'll be able to get a real bed to sleep on (as opposed to an air mattress I brought from Troy). Maybe internet for the apartment and a desk for writing. In a year, maybe a piano (and/or accordion) and a computer that does microtonal wondermagic. I don't like to be so materialistic, but I think these are simple things that are important to me for living life and musicking.

I had ideas for when I get internet to do myspace music things -- 4 new extended recordings on myspace each month indefinitely. Like the podcast of old (which the internet killed) but not. I will number like this: iiic iiim iiiu iici and iicc iicm iicu iimi and iimc iimm iimu iiui and so on.

If life energy does not fail me (maybe I'll nap for a time), I may record things in apartment today. I have goals of doing.

My car is fixed!

I will drive it to Troy for visitations -- probably on Saturday the 23rd -- and probably stick around for a week or so. I will do seeings, musickings, recordings, goodtimesings. I am hungry for tuna.

Much love in all directions.
-Androse

sicky

Friday was hell on Earth for Androse. I taught 3rd grade, or tried to. It was chaos all day. I had no control. There were fights. There were injuries. It was humiliating. Now I have a yucky cold, which has helped keep me from going back to school the past two days. I am not good at this job.

Yet.

I'm trying to be positive about this. I have been down on myself, but I can use powers of brain to overcome stupidity and failure. That is what I will do.

(What have I gotten myself into?)

Submarine Androse.

I am a submarine teacher.

(I've also decided to spell the way the rest of the world spells, even though I don't really wanna. At least for now.)

I taught second grade today. It was my first assignment ever. I survived, and so did the kids. And so did George, who was asleep the entire time in our apartment. It was not easy, but it was not hell. Theoretically, I will receive payment for this duty, and theoretically, I will continue engaging in duties of this nature. Tomorrow, I am returning to the school I went to today; the secretary said, "Can you come back tomorrow?" and I said, "Yes," and I will.

That is the way.

I have no news on my broken car. Did I mention I have a broken car? I have a broken car. It is broken. Well, actually, for a broken car it works fine. It is a well-functioning broken car. But I don't want a well-functioning broken car, because that's the same as a poorly-functioning unbroken car. I want to transform my broken car into an unbroken car. Or, I want my broken car to no longer function as a broken car.

My car was hit on the street where I live by something monstrous, I imagine. I imagine the thing that hit it was monstrous. I wasn't present at the time of the hitting. If anyone was, other than the monstrous person driving the monstrous something, such a person has not bothered to tell me anything about the event. The details of the event are unknown to me.

My car has one bumper that is functional. I also has a bumper that functions as a broken bumper.

But I don't want a well-functioning broken bumper.

Etc.

It's in the shop. I hope for good fixings. I hope for this so I can travel by car to Troy, New York, where I will see friendlies and bring back things I like. I like things sometimes and friendlies sometimes always.

I've been recording Nim songs of new and rather-new. I hope for good songlies to be done in an album-like array. I will burn and give. I play Martin bass and mandolin and vocal chordlies and things. It is nice to play things. They go in the computer and maybe come out some day as well.

mor inspiring spam

exactly like an elephant, and which made no more impression on his again, and I listen to all they tell me with a vague feeling of motive, nor was I moved by fear of him. I admired and loved him, delight. But its most precious contents were two half-crowns

it's tru

Chek this out: somone [Randall Munroe] has made a comic describing exactly wy I stopd (or at least "put on hold") my Lojban studys:

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/lojban.png

you, mir!

an Oulipian sestanagrammatina
by Androse



yarn con, more ale! pink coitus rattle imbibes
blammo! in battle to pieces or rice, urns i yank
be it cannon, i.e. mirror mask: buy sleet optical
be it labia minora, r.e.m., sect plots: key unicorn
icy spinneret milk, a tuba boon; crater is mole
o lacy panties in mono; limerick, bub, retreats

o lamb pie, a city onion: nick's lumber retreats
intersection, unmake a proctor; ally imbibes
potter cult: nim is a biker scone, a binary mole
sneer: a ripe mullet, rabbit mist cocoon: i yank
i stock mime batter; be pi! rally as one unicorn
animisn reel i.e. err, a bonny buttocks optical

bank beer scrim litter i.e. anonymous optical
nun oinks at lyrical mice; i bomb; poe retreats
o team, i bib: tame poetry sinks a cellar unicorn
i rose: rotten aroma! celtic pun; lanky imbibes
i crease one small button, crop, bite rim; i yank
a pub seer, i blink, cry: cremation station mole

limber bra pus akin, i.e. cryo-sonnet attic mole
buoyant morn: eris is like a recent b.m.: optical
b.c.: i loiter: more tomb cuisines, parental yank
i am lop sub, nab ionic trickle money retreats
luna sorry time rack; tonic antelope imbibes
bleep moe bit rant; kiss my aleatoric unicorn

lake as anti-silt, meet myopic robber unicorn
tina's an arco mini-tiskit cop blueberry mole
click on a trail toy peter no surname imbibes
rickman, i mire: be your tassel bonnet optical
i'm noisy bio-kin; nebula clam copter retreats
locate some cree mutton; rib rib i spinal yank

sir, io tracer clap! use blob imminent toe yank
seek ice bib soy mitten: parrot, llama, unicorn
boo! mini acorn, a nice skimpy bullet, retreats
true nobby loins, a tire race! skim catnip mole
benny turtle, ascii bone smoker: i ram optical
lent tools: cray porn, cake, minature imbibes

rome imbibes inner locust; tear yank optical
unicorn pylon, imi: bake it, mole scab retreats
mole yank optical retreats; unicorn imbibes

Hotti Biscotti OM 5

I wuld like u to no that last week I playd som songs at Hotti Biscotti for opn mic funtimes. Th first 2 songs wer requestd by Becky, who kindly visitd with her frend-of-ambiguous-title Russell.

.. send me up [request] > sience [request]
.. hail Discordia [debu]
.. drone
.. glockenspiels [debu]

Th latr song steals from th last 3 anagrams in th post preceedng this one. I recently recordd it along with 'how to ferment th colon'. I hope to hav a new mini-CD recordd in a week or so.

And speakng of a week or so, it seems quite likely that I'l be abl to WORK next week, in my FIELD, using my DEGREE! If al gos wel, I'l be SUBSTITUTE TEACHING on MONDAY!

This is good. I hav bils to pay and a bike to get repaird. And Xmas gifts to obtain.

I rote a cute litl blasfemus song for th holidays that I don't dare perform in public. I sang it for George and he was at least somwat "horrified". I don't hav th guts to actuly complete my "Athiest Xmas Album," but I stil think it's a good idea and I like to imajin peple's horifid faces if I wer to.

I wil, howevr, at som point, create a long chaotic CD work (most probly dedicated to Eris, godess of strife and discord [hail Eris]) cald Norbert Goes To The Zoo. (Or Norbrt gos to th Zoo.) It wil hav special gests and lots of inspiring storys.

Oulipian riting tecniqes continu to thril me; I hav an idea for an epic poem/novl about som sort of dreamy adventur ritn by alternating between paragrafs LARDING and SLENDERIZING. Larding is adng new stuf to an existng thing (for this project, adng one word between evry word in the preceedng paragraf to create a new paragraf). Slenderizing is removing stuff from an existng thing (in this case, deleting letrs from a preceedng paragraf to create a new paragraf). I think it wud be oodls of fun al around.

These ar my plans and unplans.

quintuple anagram

Inspired by th work of th Oulipo, I hav ben playng around with constraind riting lately, a hoby I do so enjoy. Last nyt, I made a triple anagram, wich I then extendd to a quintuple anagram, a variation of my very own desyn.

This technique is rathr like a "theme & variations." In this poem, th "theme" is a paragraf from pg 39 in Ulysses by James Joyce.

---

THEME

He has nowhere to put it, you mug. Bring in our Chippendale chair. Would you like a bit of something? None of your damned lawdeedaw here; the rich of a rasher fried with a herring? Sure? So much the better. We have nothing in the house but backache pills.

---

FIRST VARIATION [a sentence anagram]

We have nothing in the house but backache pills.

Would you like a bite of something? None of your damned lawdeedaw here; the rich of a rasher fried with a herring? Bring in our Chippendale chair. He has nowhere to put it, you mug. Sure? So much the better.

---

SECOND VARIATION [a word anagram]

He here?

Would something fried in lawdeedaw like a rich rasher put you in a better chair? Bring you the pills but with a herring of Chippendale? Sure the house. None of our damned bite; your backache has nothing, nowhere.

So the mug of it. We have to.

---

THIRD VARIATION [a letter anagram]

Cretin. Shall we continue rubbing our tiny glockenspiels together until they break? Would you charge me four dimes and a cube of tea? Nap.

Beth a hi hi hi hi hi. Where what fu fu.

See the horrid water there poured; How does a modern champion have his nog?

---

FOURTH VARIATION [a sentence anagram of the third variation]

Would you charge me four dimes and a cube of tea? Where what fu fu. Cretin. Shall we continue rubbing our tiny glockenspiels together until they break? See the horrid water there poured; How does a modern champion have his nog? Beth a hi hi hi hi hi.

Nap.

---

FIFTH VARIATION [a word anagram of the fourth variation]

Where horrid glockenspiels
break the modern dimes
a tiny cube does rubbing.

How hi hi hi and hi hi you charge.
Shall our tea water have a nog?
Would we continue?
Cretin there his champion; what of me, Beth?
See they poured together.
Nap until fu fu a four.

intrview & Olivre

I had a job intrview today. It was oodls of fun. If I get hired, it won't be until January, and then it wil be quite part-time, so I remain unemployd for now.

I just saw a woman who looks perfectly, exactly, utrly, certnly like Olivre.